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Who should keep the dog? - 2/8/2010 2:16:56 PM
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tenacious
Posts: 3
Joined: 2/27/2006
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A year ago, I wanted a dog. Me and my Roommate RM went to look at dogs at shelters (before we were roommates.) Sometimes, I would go by myself to look. I was looking for a specific type, the same type I grew up with. I found one, but it turned out to be more expensive than I could afford, and RM felt bad so she paid for it.
Where I was staying, I couldn’t have a dog, which maybe I jumped the gun, but was moving out soon, so RM told me I could keep the dog at her place until then. All was fine. We actually ended up moving in with each other.
I was uncomfortable to be in our apartment, since she has since been acting strange and having outbursts, I decided to take some of my stuff and the dog to a friend’s to stay temporarily. RM watched me leave with the dog, and didn’t utter a word.
Now RM says that the dog is hers since she paid for it, and I’d better bring him back. I have started move-out procedures, and intend to keep the dog. She plans to sue me in court to get the dog back, claiming it is hers, although up until we were having problems, everyone understood he was mine. I even offered to pay her some money just to end this whole mess, but she refused. She claims that because she paid for it, it is hers, although now she cannot locate the paperwork for it.
I can’t part with this dog. It means too much to me.
I don’t know what the chances are that I will get to keep him.
I am so sad.
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RE: Who should keep the dog? - 2/8/2010 2:25:20 PM
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Elena1030
Posts: 3120
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Did you pay your roommate back for the dog? Do you have any documents to support your claims?
If this went to court, I imagine the judge would want to know these things.
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Prayer thread for singles who desire to marry someday
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RE: Who should keep the dog? - 2/8/2010 2:33:53 PM
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laura...
Posts: 3367
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From: NE Ohio
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Is the dog licensed? Has it been to the vet? Whose name is on the license and vet bill?
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RE: Who should keep the dog? - 2/8/2010 2:34:55 PM
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laura...
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Mollymouser beat me to the punch. LOL
_____________________________
Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith... ...so that you will not grow weary and lose heart. Hebrew 12:3-4
Follow me on Twitter: MrsLalaD
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RE: Who should keep the dog? - 2/8/2010 4:27:22 PM
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tenacious
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He had been to the vet previous to adoption, and has not been since. He has a chip with RM name, only because she was the one paying at the beginning. I pay extra rent per month in order to take care of him. She bought him so I could have a dog. I feel if you buy someone a gift your name will be on the receipt, but it doesn’t make it yours.
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RE: Who should keep the dog? - 2/8/2010 4:34:13 PM
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Elena1030
Posts: 3120
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quote:
ORIGINAL: tenacious
He had been to the vet previous to adoption, and has not been since. He has a chip with RM name, only because she was the one paying at the beginning. I pay extra rent per month in order to take care of him. She bought him so I could have a dog. I feel if you buy someone a gift your name will be on the receipt, but it doesn’t make it yours.
But requesting that someone pay for something is not her giving you a gift, especially since ostensibly you have been incrementally paying her back.
If she had bought the dog as a gift to you, then both of you would've been clear on that, I imagine. And she might've been able to request that the chip be programmed with your info, not hers. (Can they be reprogrammed once they've been inserted underneath the dog's skin? Or do they have to be removed and switched out when the dog changes owners?)
And... no matter if the dog was a gift, something you paid back for, or something you bought yourself outright, if the license isn't in your name, then it's highly likely that legally you won't be considered to be the owner, even if you were the one who spent the bulk of time, effort, and affection on the dog.
I feel for you, but I fear that lack of paper documentation is going to hurt your case.
_____________________________
"I like to stride, not mince." -- Maggie
Prayer thread for singles who desire to marry someday
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RE: Who should keep the dog? - 2/8/2010 5:42:12 PM
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his_chosen
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You shouldn't have gotten a dog if you couldn't keep it where you were living. If all the paperwork is in RM's name, then it is RM's dog.
As far as microchipping, the microchip is simply a number. When scanned, a number pops up. Animal control then calls the microchip company which looks up the number and relays the owner's information. It is the owner's responsibility to keep that info current. So, there's no "reprogramming" the microchip.
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RE: Who should keep the dog? - 2/8/2010 5:48:51 PM
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Elena1030
Posts: 3120
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From: Music City, USA
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quote:
ORIGINAL: his_chosen
You shouldn't have gotten a dog if you couldn't keep it where you were living. If all the paperwork is in RM's name, then it is RM's dog.
As far as microchipping, the microchip is simply a number. When scanned, a number pops up. Animal control then calls the microchip company which looks up the number and relays the owner's information. It is the owner's responsibility to keep that info current. So, there's no "reprogramming" the microchip.
Eh, just a slight technological difference. Update a database entry vs. reprogramming a chip. The former definitely should be easier! 
Anyhoo, you and I are pretty much on the same page, his_chosen. 
tenacious,
This is quite sad. I hate it for you and the dog. (And for your roomie too -- that she's out of fellowship with you. Broken friendships aren't good.)
Anyway, it sounds as if the way to work this out is to somehow try to persuade RM to let you finish paying for the dog (or pay for the entire amount) and then you can make him yours.
If that doesn't work, I'm not sure what recourse you have. Maybe someone else would have a good suggestion for ya.
Hang in there!
_____________________________
"I like to stride, not mince." -- Maggie
Prayer thread for singles who desire to marry someday
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RE: Who should keep the dog? - 2/8/2010 5:56:18 PM
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bolt.
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From: Canada
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The dog belongs to your room mate, who bought him and had care of him first. Conversations you had about it don't matter. Paperwork does. There's no sense paying court fees, just let her know that you would appreciate being able to see him from time to time.
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RE: Who should keep the dog? - 2/8/2010 5:59:47 PM
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Brandy
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From: Dallas
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The sneaky thing would be to take him to the vet and and get him a check up under your name. Rabies vaccine in your name is a good thing to do as well.
Get him licensed under your name.
Call the microchip company and ask about reassigning the number, you adopted him from a moved friend.
It's all sneaky and may not work in court.
The other thing, it's highly unlikely she will take you to court, she may be trying to buffalo you.
If not, you need to have your friends be prepared to come to court with you to testify that you are primary care giver and the assumption was that it was always your dog, RM just paid for it. If you can get a few friends to do this, you may end up keeping your dog. And signed letters may/may not work, find out from the court, if it goes there, what is needed from a witness who cannot attend court.
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Our world of us.
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RE: Who should keep the dog? - 2/8/2010 6:10:04 PM
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Elena1030
Posts: 3120
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From: Music City, USA
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Brandy
The sneaky thing would be to take him to the vet and and get him a check up under your name. Rabies vaccine in your name is a good thing to do as well.
Get him licensed under your name.
Call the microchip company and ask about reassigning the number, you adopted him from a moved friend.
It's all sneaky and may not work in court.
The other thing, it's highly unlikely she will take you to court, she may be trying to buffalo you.
If not, you need to have your friends be prepared to come to court with you to testify that you are primary care giver and the assumption was that it was always your dog, RM just paid for it. If you can get a few friends to do this, you may end up keeping your dog. And signed letters may/may not work, find out from the court, if it goes there, what is needed from a witness who cannot attend court.
If this ends up going to court, then having been "sneaky" about it would not help tenacious's case at all!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
You have to grieve the separation from the dog and hope to be able to arrange visits, as bolt suggested.
And... if it's affordable and the current living situation allows, getting a new pet might be an ok way to help deal with the loss. It's not the ideal, but it might be worth considering.
[edited by moderator for screen formatting]
< Message edited by Ps103 -- 2/9/2010 11:33:31 AM >
_____________________________
"I like to stride, not mince." -- Maggie
Prayer thread for singles who desire to marry someday
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RE: Who should keep the dog? - 2/8/2010 6:22:07 PM
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laura...
Posts: 3367
Joined: 3/1/2005
From: NE Ohio
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quote:
ORIGINAL: tenacious
He had been to the vet previous to adoption, and has not been since. He has a chip with RM name, only because she was the one paying at the beginning. I pay extra rent per month in order to take care of him. She bought him so I could have a dog.
The dog belongs to your roommate. Return the dog to your roommate along with a notarized letter requesting a refund for all the extra rent that you paid due to the dog.
quote:
I feel if you buy someone a gift your name will be on the receipt, but it doesn’t make it yours.
This is true. However, proving that the dog was a gift would be difficult.
quote:
Call the microchip company and ask about reassigning the number, you adopted him from a moved friend.
AFAIK, the registered owner is the only one who can change that information.
_____________________________
Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith... ...so that you will not grow weary and lose heart. Hebrew 12:3-4
Follow me on Twitter: MrsLalaD
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RE: Who should keep the dog? - 2/8/2010 8:18:36 PM
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deermousie
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A judge would ask to see the paperwork.
But here's a related thought - if you're both Christians, we are counseled to rather be defrauded than to let a nonChristian judge us.
1 If any of you has a dispute with another, dare he take it before the ungodly for judgment instead of before the saints? 2Do you not know that the saints will judge the world? And if you are to judge the world, are you not competent to judge trivial cases? 3Do you not know that we will judge angels? How much more the things of this life! 4Therefore, if you have disputes about such matters, appoint as judges even men of little account in the church![a] 5I say this to shame you. Is it possible that there is nobody among you wise enough to judge a dispute between believers? 6But instead, one brother goes to law against another—and this in front of unbelievers!
7The very fact that you have lawsuits among you means you have been completely defeated already. Why not rather be wronged? Why not rather be cheated? 8Instead, you yourselves cheat and do wrong, and you do this to your brothers.
1 Cor. 6
If she's not saved or you aren't, then you could take her and any paperwork to small claims court.
It's tough when we give our hearts to a dog and then can't have them. Their lives are too short as it is, and you have this problem as well. May God give you wisdom.
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Laugh, dance, praise your God, and go read some more. And God bless you.
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RE: Who should keep the dog? - 2/8/2010 9:58:57 PM
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Brandy
Posts: 1521
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From: Dallas
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I never said the ideas were good ones, but I've seen them work before...
Does RM sincerely want the dog bacK? would she take care of the dog?
Are you wanting to keep the dog out of spite towards the RM?
This is why I discourage people from getting pets with roommates, get it on your own in your name from the get go.
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~Brandy
Our world of us.
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RE: Who should keep the dog? - 2/9/2010 12:02:36 AM
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Kerrlaw
Posts: 5255
Joined: 5/24/2006
From: Big Orange Country
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quote:
I found one, but it turned out to be more expensive than I could afford, and RM felt bad so she paid for it.
Sounds like a gift to me.
quote:
Where I was staying, I couldn’t have a dog, which maybe I jumped the gun, but was moving out soon, so RM told me I could keep the dog at her place until then
An acknowledgment of your ownership.
quote:
RM watched me leave with the dog, and didn’t utter a word.
Tacit admission that it is your dog.
Don't give in on this if you believe it is your dog. She may be bluffing about going to court, but if she isn't, and things do not seem to be going well, as a last resort call the dog as a witness. Tell the judge you want to see who the dog will come to. Be sure you have trained him, and have some treats in your pocket. 
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That which does not kill us makes us fatter. ~ crankius
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RE: Who should keep the dog? - 2/9/2010 8:48:17 PM
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still4gvn
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From: just north of Seattle, WA
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March 2009 you posted that you 'don't much like dogs' and it was a problem that your friend was obsessed with them. Now you say you got this dog a year ago. Is the roommate the same friend? Are you a guy and is this perhaps the way you-all are working out the relationship? Is this a triangle or a four part relationship (friend, roommie, u and dog?)
Do u know cats rule, dogs drool?
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RE: Who should keep the dog? - 2/10/2010 2:06:37 AM
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myhusbandswife76
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I'm confused. In your OP you said:
quote:
A year ago, I wanted a dog. Me and my Roommate RM went to look at dogs at shelters (before we were roommates.)
But in your post from March of last year (about a year ago), you said:
quote:
I don’t like dogs much
quote:
I sometimes wonder if she’s trying to convert me into being an animal lover
quote:
Recently, she got a new dog. She keeps pestering me via email to come see it
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RE: Who should keep the dog? - 2/10/2010 2:54:58 PM
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Kerrlaw
Posts: 5255
Joined: 5/24/2006
From: Big Orange Country
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quote:
ORIGINAL: myhusbandswife76
I'm confused. In your OP you said:
quote:
A year ago, I wanted a dog. Me and my Roommate RM went to look at dogs at shelters (before we were roommates.)
But in your post from March of last year (about a year ago), you said:
quote:
I don’t like dogs much
quote:
I sometimes wonder if she’s trying to convert me into being an animal lover
quote:
Recently, she got a new dog. She keeps pestering me via email to come see it
Uh oh.
You can run. but you can't hide.
_____________________________
That which does not kill us makes us fatter. ~ crankius
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RE: Who should keep the dog? - 2/10/2010 3:48:47 PM
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ladioffaith
Posts: 3435
Joined: 3/31/2005
From: NE Ohio (L.A. . . Lower Akron)
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It sounds like the dog belongs to the roomate, but unless I am missing something, the roommate's only connection to the pet is financial.
Is your roommate asking for continued contact with the pet, or is she just trying to get money out of the situation?
It's sad that two people who were once friends can't work this out between themselves.
My Roomate and I have 2 cats .... Foster Kitty ("temporarily" loaned to Roomie when a friend could no longer keep him) and Gizmo, given to me by my cousin. Should Roomie ever move, Foster Kitty goes along and Gizzy Girl is mine, even though due to Roomie's severe lack of finances, I generally pay for food, litter and flea meds for both cats. (Roomie's ex friend used to share in these costs but no longer does so.)
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The LORD your God is with you, he is mighty to save.
He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with
his love, he will rejoice over you with singing." Zeph. 3:17
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RE: Who should keep the dog? - 2/10/2010 6:26:00 PM
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tenacious
Posts: 3
Joined: 2/27/2006
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quote:
ORIGINAL: myhusbandswife76
I'm confused. In your OP you said:
quote:
A year ago, I wanted a dog. Me and my Roommate RM went to look at dogs at shelters (before we were roommates.)
But in your post from March of last year (about a year ago), you said:
quote:
I don’t like dogs much
quote:
I sometimes wonder if she’s trying to convert me into being an animal lover
quote:
Recently, she got a new dog. She keeps pestering me via email to come see it
Ok…for my privacy, the animal I am really talking about in this situation is not really a dog, in the case RM would read this….I forgot about the post a year ago. The situation itself is not made up. I’m not being sarcastic, but I truly didn’t realize anyone cross-checks postings for consistency.
Anyway, my question is more about the situation, rather than what type of animal it is.
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RE: Who should keep the dog? - 2/11/2010 4:51:11 PM
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_Don_
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From: Close enough to the mountains.
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The person that should keep the dog is the one who upon the decision of the judge to cut the dog in two doesn't immediately think of how much it'll be worth at the market offers to give the dog up to the other person.
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