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RE: We're baaaaaack! December Homeschool Chat thread - 12/1/2008 6:48:27 PM
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Ellie-Mae
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Anne, I forgot to say that I am in prayer for you too.
Narnia, I am not using a curriculum for Character enhancement (and training). We are talking about people in the Bible who sought after and claimed blessings from the Lord. We just looked at Caleb who God had promised to bless with land and in Joshua 14;12 you can see the determination that he was willing to have to claim that promise (blessing). It was his and he was bound and determined not to miss out on it. He was going to have every blessing that God would have for him. That is why it became my life verse. I am willing, determined even, to work hard, suffer long, and face frightening situations in order to be able to obtain every blessing that God has for me (not that I am always successful). (When we talked to the kids about this it made better sense and sounded way more exciting)
Anyway, every time we make a good choice (a choice that God would have us make), we are grabbing another blessing. EVERY TIME. Sometimes we are grabbing a blessing that God would have for us by natural consequences: choose to pick up your room and you will be blessed with unbroken and easy to find toys. Some blessings are just plain God: We are praying that by keeping our house nicer that maybe God will choose to send us more visitors. So I challenged them to make good choices. God really wants to bless His children.
Yesterday, I made a container to fill with little kernels of popping corn. Every time they make a good decision they get to pop one of those kernels into the container. When it is full, we will do something special. It is really easy to "grab a blessing". They can figure out a way to not argue. They can choose to pick up the pencil instead of walking by it. They can do something helpful without being told. They can obey immediately and with a good attitude. They can help some one else. They can get one for each subject that they finish. All kinds of ways to make good decisions. They can memorize a verse, write a prayer journal, read their Bible, Come up with their own lesson from the Bible....
The only two rule so far is that they can't do something when they have been told to do something else before they have finished obeying. and they need to tell us what they did before they pop a kernel into the container.
We are hoping that this will not only help them to grow spiritually, but also to develop the habit of both being aware of their surroundings and taking the initiative to make good choices.
One of the things I am going to do is to pick verses and passages to place around the house at eye level that will teach them what good choices are. Philippians 4:8, The love chapter, the fruits of the spirit, and the beatitudes to start with. We will go over the verses, and talk about how they affect the kind of choices that we would make if trying to make good choices. When they have to face a wall because they are in trouble, we can even have them stand if front of one of the verses. We will be able to talk about why their choice want a good one based on the Scripture.
That is what we are doing this month. We will still be doing school, but I am concentrating on their Character.
< Message edited by Ellie-Mae -- 12/1/2008 6:56:21 PM >
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RE: We're baaaaaack! December Homeschool Chat thread - 12/1/2008 6:51:43 PM
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cindybode
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quote:
ORIGINAL: his_chosen
Cindy--a duck in your kitchen? And not the eating variety? No, not terribly surprised.
Well she IS the eating variety, but so far she is still breathing and has all her feathers. We think she may have been stepped on. She was found stuck in a mud puddle and is walking a bit funny, but she doesn't seem seriously injured so I think she'll be ok. We brought her in to clean her up and see what was wrong with her, but we'll move her to the barn tonight.
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If you lock in any creature, from rats to chickens to pigs to people, 10 to 30 or more in a box and force feed them you'll create little monsters. Confinement Education School Operations (CESOs) just don't compare to naturally pastured free-ranged kids.
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RE: We're baaaaaack! December Homeschool Chat thread - 12/1/2008 7:54:42 PM
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narnia
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Thanks Ellie.
We think my blessing is coming down with something. She acts fine during the day for the most part, but when it comes time to eat, she says she has a stomach ache. She did that the past couple of days.
I let her sleep in today so she did not get up until 11:30 a.m. We sat down to eat around 5 or so and she complained of her stomach ache and I told her to go lie down on her bed. She fell asleep.
Better she become ill now than when we are traveling but I told dh they may be staying home this week. Obviously her immune system is compromised and if she picks up something anyone else has it will just compound the problem.
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RE: We're baaaaaack! December Homeschool Chat thread - 12/1/2008 8:37:48 PM
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Homegrownkids
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I'm not sure how the visit went.... I don't want to say it went okay, but yet, I don't want to say it went horrible either. Basically life will go on like it does. But, she wanted to tell us that she will be attending other churches, at the same time as ours. She told us she wants to go to other churches due to my husband's preaching. She said his preaching is accurate, it is good, but it is the delivery style she can't stand. SHe is looking for more compassion and passion. She is an emotional 72 yr old and I think she's looking for that. Her emotion is good, I wish more people had her zeal when it comes to the gospel. I tried to explain to her that at a basketball game, she is the type that would yell and scream with emotion, but my Dh is the type that would stay calm and sit, but still be full of energy and emotion on the inside. It is just a difference in personality. All and all that part went okay. What got to me though, and my Dh might call her later to get this settled, is that she felt sorry for our kids because this is the only teaching they get (referring to my husband's preaching). This to me was way off base and ignorant. It was kind of a slap in the face, too. I didn't know how to respond to this, so I didn't. I only repeated what she said in a question to make sure I heard her right. I asked her if she felt sorry for our kids and she said yes.
Thank you for the prayers. Thank you, Cynthia, for your PM. Now just pray that we move on, and pray that if we need to bring anything back up with her, for further discussion that we will know what to do and say.
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RE: We're baaaaaack! December Homeschool Chat thread - 12/1/2008 9:21:38 PM
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cynthia
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Annie, I hope you are not taking her comments to heart about her feeling sorry for your kids. That was just plain rude. Let it go. You don't have to receive lies.
< Message edited by cynthia -- 12/1/2008 10:24:25 PM >
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RE: We're baaaaaack! December Homeschool Chat thread - 12/1/2008 9:35:54 PM
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2jsmom
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Annie, that's awful. We don't all have to be emotional. In fact, sometimes emotions can lead us astray. As long as she agrees that your husband is preaching the truth, she doesn't have a valid complaint in my opinion. The comment about your children was way out of line. I agree with Cynthia, you don't have to receive that.
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RE: We're baaaaaack! December Homeschool Chat thread - 12/1/2008 10:19:29 PM
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Homegrownkids
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Well, now that my husband has had time to "digest" what she has said, he is really feeling low. Like he is a failure and dead weight. Not even good enough to teach his own children. I think he will end up talking to her again. He doesn't really like the idea of her attending both churches just because she isn't happy about something at our church. She needs to pick one. She is a strange type of person. She has a very different character to begin with. I have been trying to encourage my husband through that... by telling him to look at the source. She can be a very sweet lady, but at the same time, she is a very hard lady to be around.
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RE: We're baaaaaack! December Homeschool Chat thread - 12/1/2008 10:30:16 PM
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cynthia
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Homegrownkids
Well, now that my husband has had time to "digest" what she has said, he is really feeling low. Like he is a failure and dead weight. Not even good enough to teach his own children. I think he will end up talking to her again. He doesn't really like the idea of her attending both churches just because she isn't happy about something at our church. She needs to pick one. She is a strange type of person. She has a very different character to begin with. I have been trying to encourage my husband through that... by telling him to look at the source. She can be a very sweet lady, but at the same time, she is a very hard lady to be around.
She doesn't sounds sweet. Your husband has got to learn how to stand up and walk in power. I don't see the point in talking to the woman about it further. He is giving place to her complaints, which are that she doesn't like his style. Too bad. If he changes his style to suit everyone, he would be changing every week and would end up with everyone mad at him and confused besides. If he had some kind of problem that was irritating to people in general, that would be one thing, but that's not the problem. It is very unhealthy for him to let stuff like this get to him. It is normal for a pastor to get criticism, but to listen to it and let people go on and on about it, then receive it and feel bad is not healthy at all.
(And sorry for calling you Melissa.)
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My husband and I have a motto:
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RE: We're baaaaaack! December Homeschool Chat thread - 12/1/2008 10:44:16 PM
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Ellie-Mae
Posts: 3582
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Anne, Don't receive what she says. What she said about the kids was just to be hurtful. don't let it reach it's mark. I am sure that your kids enjoy learning and being with their Dad who knows his stuff. What better teacher could one want?
ETA: When it comes down to it, I would consider that conversation an encouraging one. Your husband is preaching God's word accurately. the only issue is she has different preferences in how it should be delivered. Great! That is why there are different churches... because different people learn differently... even the Bible.
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Please do not PM me about this message, discuss it at the water cooler, or include it in your church bulletins. If you have questions, please keep them to yourself. ~Kerrlaw
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RE: We're baaaaaack! December Homeschool Chat thread - 12/1/2008 11:16:25 PM
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Homegrownkids
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When I see she is sweet, I mean she is always bringing us food and would give us the shirt off her back. She is a very giving person... although sometimes she drives me nuts about that. She will call on the phone, not say who she is and just tell us that she'll be here in two minutes and we are expected to meet her outside while she hands us things. If we aren't there, or don't answer are phone she sounds mad. She also says that no body likes her. She offends people easily and she knows that. She does have issues.
The problem with my Dh is that he is sensitive. He takes people's words seriously because people should mean what they say. So, if someone tells him that he isn't loving and compassionate he will look deep into himself to figure out if that is true or not, and to figure out what his motives are. My Dh is about the most sincere person you could ever meet! Well... if you remember back a couple of years ago, we had a similar situation in another church, where a lady (about the same age even) made comments about my Dh and him being a pastor and then even yelled at us for homeschooling and teaching our kids to be just like us. And, even in our very last church we had an older man that was not always good to our family. There will always be one in every church I guess. But, you could see where my Dh is coming from. He wonders if these people are "seeing" something, if it is true, and if he's just fooling himself to be in the ministry. I know it sounds silly, but he needs prayer to get through this.
quote:
If he had some kind of problem that was irritating to people in general, that would be one thing, but that's not the problem.
When we first got here, he had that seizure, which really "knocked" his brain out of whack. It has truly impacted his memory, he has to stay close to his notes during a sermon and he looses his train of thought if he doesn't. On our evaluations, after being here 6 months, this was an irritating problem to some of the congregation (his social skills and sermon delivery). We decided to hang in there in hopes that in time things would go better. We *think* people are liking us and things are going better. But, this is another reason why he has taken it personally. Wondering if he is truly fitting in here okay.
I'm sure this will all pass over and in a couple of days he will feel better. He is in the process right now of writing a letter to the church.
Cynthia... I wish you were here to give my Dh a pep talk. I am getting over things, but I do worry about him.
< Message edited by Homegrownkids -- 12/1/2008 11:25:35 PM >
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RE: We're baaaaaack! December Homeschool Chat thread - 12/2/2008 12:04:43 AM
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misaham
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quote:
When I see she is sweet, I mean she is always bringing us food and would give us the shirt off her back. She is a very giving person... although sometimes she drives me nuts about that. She will call on the phone, not say who she is and just tell us that she'll be here in two minutes and we are expected to meet her outside while she hands us things.
Yeah, I did not mean to sound insulting. Maybe she is lonely.
But I agree, there are different styles of preaching and we all have different tastes. That does not mean that anyone is "wrong".
I will also be praying that this will pass quickly and he will not be too impacted by it.
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RE: We're baaaaaack! December Homeschool Chat thread - 12/2/2008 1:16:50 AM
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cynthia
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Annie, What is your husband going to write the congregation about? I think you should pray that it passes quickly, but also pray that he learns to reject lies. We are to put up the shield of faith, not let the arrows in. Satan uses sinner and saint alike to do his bidding when he can. Your husband has got to learn to listen for the voice of the Holy Spirit to convict him, not the random complainer.
_____________________________
My husband and I have a motto:
We are the leader. We are one.
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RE: We're baaaaaack! December Homeschool Chat thread - 12/2/2008 1:22:55 AM
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cynthia
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Annie, I was reading this to my husband and he gives me an odd look and says, "He's teaching them? He's their only teacher?" (referring to what the woman said) Apparently she doesn't even recognize the instruction they get from their mother. (See Proverbs 1:7-9) She is not with the program, Annie. She is just being silly. Why listen to that? What give it merit? Stand up, shake it off, tell the devil to flee, praise God He is on the throne and in charge of you and your family.
_____________________________
My husband and I have a motto:
We are the leader. We are one.
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RE: We're baaaaaack! December Homeschool Chat thread - 12/2/2008 3:55:57 AM
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Homegrownkids
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Yes, I agee Cynthia. I haven't looked at his letter to the church yet. I think he is writting about listening to the conent of a sermon and to not let the style of the delivery take away from that. Another thing that bothered this lady is that she thinks he gets his sermons off of the internet. In our last church, an elderly man thought the same thing. I don't think elderly full understand that typed up notes doesn't mean that they are from someone else. He types up his notes, his outline, but they are his notes. So, she not only doesn't like the way he preaches, she doesn't think they are his sermons... or from the Holy Ghost, she thinks he gets them from someone else. Which isn't true. He gets his ideas from many resources, but they are his words not someone else's and even if they were someone else's words, if that is what he is led to do than so be it.
My husband wants to talk to her again. He might write it in a note to her, not sure. But, he wants her to choose which church she wants to belong to. Which pastor she wants to be under. She gave us Christmas money and my Dh wants us to return it. I have no problem with that. It wasn't that fun to accept Christmas money after she said what she did.
And yes, your husband is right Cynthia. My husband is not their only teacher, that is why it is so odd and wrong of her. Our children get me, they get sermons on tape, they get Christian radio, S.School teachers... and the list goes on. Even their school books are christian based. What bothers me is she acted like our children's salvation is based on his sermons. She said something like... I feel sorry for your children, all these years of getting this as their teaching (referring to his sermons). I thought that was downright rude.
My Dh is doing better, still hurt, but doing better. I am fine, too. Just wish I coulf "fix" everything..lol
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RE: We're baaaaaack! December Homeschool Chat thread - 12/2/2008 11:46:21 AM
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Homegrownkids
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Wow, it is pretty quiet in here this morning.
I am going to go pick up my Ds this afternoon and I'm so happy to do that! I miss him! THis was his first time away from home all by himself.
Dh is doing better this morning. He needed some encouragement this morning to "shake it off", but then he got up and went out visiting people. I honestly think this was a spritual thing because some of the things she mentioned to us were so out of whack. The more I think about it the more ridiculous some of the things were.
It is a bright, beautiful day here.
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God heals!
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RE: We're baaaaaack! December Homeschool Chat thread - 12/2/2008 2:17:52 PM
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homeschoolmom36
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Hi everyone!! I am new to this site, did not know you were here. I have been homeschooling my 6th grader for 3 years and I have two others that are in ps. I get so much grief from my family about hs. Drives me crazy.
I can relate to you all about family and the negativity. Just got back from my sisters, she has been divorced for 15 years and it still seems like it was yesterday the way she talks. I am celebrating my 17th anniversary this year and that is the year she was divorced so she keeps telling me that mine will be over to. I dislike someone putting negative thoughts like that in my life. My marriage is great!!
I hope we all make it through the holidays with all of our hair.....
I am so happy I found this site.
Happy Schooling!
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RE: We're baaaaaack! December Homeschool Chat thread - 12/2/2008 2:23:36 PM
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2jsmom
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Welcome Homeschoolmom36. What an awful thing for your sister to say! Don't listen to her sour grapes. I've been married 29 years and it's still great.
_____________________________
"Everybody is a genius. But, if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will spend its whole life believing that it is stupid." - Albert Einstein
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RE: We're baaaaaack! December Homeschool Chat thread - 12/2/2008 2:50:13 PM
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Shells54
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welcome homeschoolmom36. I agree about not letting anything negative in the marriage. My hubby's mother used to say it wouldn't last past 7 years and it took me along time to really trust him. I kept waiting for him to leave and we are going on 13 years.
This is my first year homeschooling and it has been going pretty good. Well except for the beginning when school actually started here and I had that ah what am I doing moment but since then its been good.
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It does not seem that she is as sweet as she seems. 
He doesn't want to go to the doctor because it will make it hard for us to switch insurances. I know he's afraid of ending up like his dad, but denial isn't going to help. He's a couple of years older than his dad was when he was diagnosed and his dad's sugars were in the 400's at the beginning. His dad didn't take care of himself either. He just ate all the sugar he wanted and then took insulin. His readings were often off the meter at the high end and it never concerned him.
