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RE: HOW DO I TELL HIM - 11/21/2008 4:33:04 PM
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Focusing
Posts: 6007
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Live separate lives. If he changes, it will be real and permanent.
Yes, it is hard. Stay strong!
I am continuing to pray ((( hugs )))
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Instead of a gem, or even a flower, we should cast the gift of a loving thought into the heart of a friend. That would be giving as the angels give.
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RE: HOW DO I TELL HIM - 11/21/2008 4:52:30 PM
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laura...
Posts: 2925
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From: NE Ohio
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quote:
He said he would get a full time job but that his business prospects are increasing.
And, what would him getting a full time job change other than having a steady paycheck?
How much would go towards his child support? How will that change the fact that he hasn't consistently paid his child support?
What guarantee would you have that he will keep a job?
Why would you want to be in a relationship with someone that only promises to handle his responsibilities when you break up with him? Will you have to spend your life threatening him? That's no way to live, love or share your life with someone.
Stop listening to his promises and start looking at his character.
quote:
He said he wanted to get counseling with our pastor or senior mentors regarding this issue. I called the senior mentors and am waiting for a return call.
Good idea. I suggest you get some counseling on your own to discover why you allow him to manipulate you and not demand that he respect your boundaries giving you the space that you need before you have any counseling as a couple. In my opinion any dating relationship that needs to seek couple's counseling in order to resolve major issues shouldn't be in a relationship.
_____________________________
This is what the Lord says: “Stop at the crossroads and look around. Ask for the old, godly way, and walk in it. Travel its path, and you will find rest for your souls. But you reply, ‘No, that’s not the road we want!’ Jer 6:16
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RE: HOW DO I TELL HIM - 11/22/2008 2:35:27 PM
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prov2717ironsharpens
Posts: 16
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quote:
Stop listening to his promises and start looking at his character.
Yes, that's what I'm choosing to look at slowly, his character. This is why I haven't seen him since Tuesday. I am choosing to take a stand for me and what the Lord wants for my life. This is very difficult. It was so funny because last night I went out with girlfriends and on the ride home, I felt really lonely for him and was tempted to call. I turned on the radio and there was a song that was playing (forgot title) which basically said you need to think about you for a change and not him. You are worth more and you need to believe it. I thought that was so ironic and chuckled and was able to move past my longings. The Lord does show up right on time in many forms.
quote:
In my opinion any dating relationship that needs to seek couple's counseling in order to resolve major issues shouldn't be in a relationship.
I agree that if you're dating and have to seek counseling for major issues in a relationship you possibly shouldn't continue; however, a couple that is engaged who is experiencing issues should seek pre-marital counseling.
quote:
Why would you want to be in a relationship with someone that only promises to handle his responsibilities when you break up with him? Honestly, I think if I had broken up with him many times before and he promised to change and then regressed, I would have a point of reference about that patternsee that pattern of his behavior; however, this is the first time I've broken up with him. I know there are situations where we treat the Lord the same way and he doens't cut us off but loves us inspite of and allow us time to change. I will allow him time to change while adhering to my boundaries and not seeing him. I will choose to pay attention to what I want this time and make it only about that, not anyone else.
I have to be honest about what I'm willing to do for my life and honor that. I do understand partly why I have allowed him to manipulate me -- because I have been taught to get over my pain quickly. I have given others a false perception of me (super woman) and that's why they continue to push past what I've said because I send mixed messages of I'm okay, i'm over the pain, I believe you'll change, etc. I need to be firm and take a stand once and for all and that's what I'm doing. Sufficient are the problems/challenges/worries of today, tomorrow will take care of tomorrow. Matt. 6:34 One day at a time for me.
Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.
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RE: HOW DO I TELL HIM - 11/22/2008 3:34:54 PM
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creationtalk
Posts: 705
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quote:
ORIGINAL: prov2717ironsharpens
I'm here and this is hard, very hard. He won't stop calling me even as I've asked him to give me space. I did get weak to his convincing me that he is desiring to change. Then woke up yesterday wanting to smacked myself across the face because I'm so gullible to believe it's going to happen this easily and not to give in so quickly.
If he won't stop calling, I suggest you call the phone company and have his number blocked or change your number, which ever is easier and quicker.
I really feel for you. I know what it is like to struggle with being alone...and I've done a lot of stupid things to get out of being alone, and all they managed to do was make the aloneness worse. Now I am trusting in the Lord. I don't want to spend my life alone...but I can tell you from bitter experience that it is FAR better to be alone than with someone who will use you, abuse you, demean you, etc....
Stay strong in the Lord. "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."
Blessings to you.
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RE: HOW DO I TELL HIM - 11/24/2008 10:40:32 AM
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laura...
Posts: 2925
Joined: 3/1/2005
From: NE Ohio
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quote:
Honestly, I think if I had broken up with him many times before and he promised to change and then regressed, I would have a point of reference about that patternsee that pattern of his behavior; however, this is the first time I've broken up with him. I know there are situations where we treat the Lord the same way and he doens't cut us off but loves us inspite of and allow us time to change. I will allow him time to change while adhering to my boundaries and not seeing him. I will choose to pay attention to what I want this time and make it only about that, not anyone else.
What can he do to demonstrate to you that he has changed regarding having not paid child support?
_____________________________
This is what the Lord says: “Stop at the crossroads and look around. Ask for the old, godly way, and walk in it. Travel its path, and you will find rest for your souls. But you reply, ‘No, that’s not the road we want!’ Jer 6:16
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RE: HOW DO I TELL HIM - 11/24/2008 4:30:58 PM
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prov2717ironsharpens
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He can't demonstrate anything today but maybe a year's worth of consistency might be good with me out of the picture. This way I'll know he's doing it for his children and longs to please the Lord. I need to move onward and upward. I'm so tired and want my heart to stop aching. Today isn't a good day. Tomorrow has got to be better.
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RE: HOW DO I TELL HIM - 11/24/2008 6:29:58 PM
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deermousie
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Try to get a little exercise - it's a natural mood lifter. And do what you can to get enough sleep. I'm sorry you hurt, dear one. Everyday will be a little better, with occasional swings low that will lift again. Hang tough!
(((Hugs)))
_____________________________
Want to know where a certain word or phrase in the Bible is found? www.biblegateway.com Yay!
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RE: HOW DO I TELL HIM - 11/30/2008 8:33:50 AM
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prov2717ironsharpens
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Update: Well it's been almost 2 weeks since I broke up with him. He has repeatedly called asking for another chance, stating things are going to change, that he loves me and will not let me go. I don't know what the "will not let me go" phrase actually means. I will say sometimes it's a little scary because I'm not sure where he might go with feeling this rejected. He has never hurt me, put his hands on me or abused me verbally; however, he almost appears to be a stalker. I have been keeping myself very busy by going out with my cousins and female friends. When he calls me, I let the answering machine pick up. He leaves long messages about having to tell me something funny to why haven't you called me, this is not like you. I told him I needed space and that the telephone is included in that. He finally said last night that he won't call me for two days but if I called him, he would be available but would give me two days. He's going to give me two days -- I said no, I need space, please don't call me. He said I believe you might leave me and I can't have that, that he will do whatever it takes to keep me. What does that mean? I won't lie and say I'm not a tadbit concerned. Last night, he called me 5 times within a 3 hour period, 3 of those times were text messages. It was almost like harrassment. I don't know but I am praying, saving my text messages, and telling my girlfriends about his bizarre behavior.
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RE: HOW DO I TELL HIM - 11/30/2008 9:06:53 AM
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pbaribeault
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It's not "almost like harassment" -- it is harassment.
If he can't respect your requests that he not contact you ("Please don't call me." is clear and firm.) you need some technical assistance. Your phone company should be able to block any incoming number you want them to, no questions asked. Your phone is your property and other people are not permitted to use it without your permission.
I'd also suggest that you not listen to the messages (That's hard, I know, but it's harder to live with what he says than to live with curiosity about what he might have said.) You don't need to listen, and you certainly don't need to have any "I don't want to loose you." conversations. Every time that you have a live conversion you are prolonging his 'hope' (and making your own adjustment harder).
Really, I think you are seeing in him a breakdown of self control into impulsive emotive actions (meaning "I want" equals "I do") but not necessarily threatening-evil-stalker type stuff yet. But it does show you what kind of man he is -- he's hurt, but instead of grieving and moving on he goes into a tailspin of irrationality. That's not a grown up, that's a very large child who just can't take his desires being removed from him. You should be grateful that his non-employment behaviour gave you an insight into his childish mindset before you had to deal with him as a wife to a husband. (Non-employment would have been among your smaller difficulties.)
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RE: HOW DO I TELL HIM - 11/30/2008 10:39:07 AM
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deermousie
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quote:
ORIGINAL: prov2717ironsharpens
stating things are going to change, that he loves me and will not let me go. I don't know what the "will not let me go" phrase actually means.
In your shoes, just as a backup, I'd take these tapes to the police department and make a report if they'll take it. His words may constitute a legal threat. And then you can tell him that you've given his words to the police; that should cool his ardor some and let him know you're not unprotected from him.
quote:
I will say sometimes it's a little scary because I'm not sure where he might go with feeling this rejected.
If you say to the police "I feel threatened and unsafe" I think they have to take action.
quote:
He has never hurt me, put his hands on me or abused me verbally; however, he almost appears to be a stalker.
You might be able to get a restraining order; dunno. I think you have to have proof of a beating or something, but threatening words might be admissable. Ask.
quote:
I have been keeping myself very busy by going out with my cousins and female friends. When he calls me, I let the answering machine pick up. He leaves long messages about having to tell me something funny to why haven't you called me, this is not like you. I told him I needed space and that the telephone is included in that. He finally said last night that he won't call me for two days but if I called him, he would be available but would give me two days. He's going to give me two days -- I said no, I need space, please don't call me. He said I believe you might leave me and I can't have that, that he will do whatever it takes to keep me. What does that mean? I won't lie and say I'm not a tadbit concerned. Last night, he called me 5 times within a 3 hour period, 3 of those times were text messages. It was almost like harrassment. I don't know but I am praying, saving my text messages, and telling my girlfriends about his bizarre behavior.
Tell the police. And you might want to tell this guy it's OVER. Done. Don't call anymore. If in two years he can show he's been employed for two years, you might talk to him. But personally I wouldn't give him any hope because he'll cling to that and then maybe try to renegotiate for less time and lower standards.
I'm sorry, Prov27; this must be so hard on you. You've both got whirling emotions, but you're trying to balance and do it right and he's just trying to keep his pacifier from going away.
You've told him you need space and he's not giving you any. That's a lot of disrespect. He's doing this to meet his needs, not yours. In fact, he's demanding you meet his needs when it's hurtful to you. He's just revealed himself for the hurtful, demanding person he is, and it's ugly.
He's a total opposite of what a Christian man should be: protective (fail), providing (fail), living with a wife in an understanding way (that trait doesn't suddenly arrive full blown at a wedding, but is developed long before the wedding - fail), nonforceful (Christianity is voluntary - God doesn't force us to stop sinning, He just gives us consequences to make us want to stop - fail), and putting another person's interests as more important than his own (fail).
It might be time to change your phone number, and leave town for a month (wouldn't you like to take a vacation and go to Florida or something? The hurricane season is over) or even move. He'll still be begging and threatening in a month, but some of the wind will be out of his sails. I think this guy is used to being stronger and more forceful than you and I wonder if he is counting on you to continue to be pretty defenseless against him.
If that is so and if I were you... and this may start a firestorm, and that's fine... I'd go to the local shooting range and start trying out some nice little hand guns. Yeah, guns, and a permit. Because if this guy gets violent with you and you are in danger of your life, you'll have seconds to respond and the police are minutes away. Self-defense is moral if you are in danger of death. So get yourself some training on how to be legal and safe. There are some no-nonsense trainers at the range who are happy to be helpful to beginners.
It may be you'd rather be killed than defend yourself, and that's your choice. But the law doesn't do anything to people who've used clear self-defense. The "do not kill" in Scripture is literally "do not murder": taking a life because you just felt like it or could gain from it. Killing in war and in self-defense is biblical, and our laws reflect this.
I'm sorry you have to deal with all of this. Get proper authority into gear: your pastor, the police, and your father if he's around and can help. You've been partly under this man's authority (or pseudo-authority) and you're struggling to get out and get things right and he doesn't want you to. I think you've handled it well, but it might be time to do more if he keeps ratcheting up his intentions (change your phone number, move, get armed, and so on). Stay safe, and may God heal your heart, dear one. (((Hugs)))
< Message edited by deermousie -- 11/30/2008 10:54:42 AM >
_____________________________
Want to know where a certain word or phrase in the Bible is found? www.biblegateway.com Yay!
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RE: HOW DO I TELL HIM - 11/30/2008 10:52:55 AM
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deermousie
Posts: 1946
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quote:
ORIGINAL: prov2717ironsharpens
He can't demonstrate anything today but maybe a year's worth of consistency might be good with me out of the picture. This way I'll know he's doing it for his children and longs to please the Lord.
He isn't doing anything for his children - he has abandoned them. God has said what He thinks about a man who doesn't provide for his own - he's worse than a person who is going to hell. God said that. This man has NOT been longing to please the Lord up to now. How many years has that been?
And who was the mother of these children? He wasn't married to her - that's long-term fornication. Has he repented of that? If she is raising those kids, has he supported her so the kids can have a full-time mom?
This guy looks worse and worse.
_____________________________
Want to know where a certain word or phrase in the Bible is found? www.biblegateway.com Yay!
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RE: HOW DO I TELL HIM - 11/30/2008 11:41:43 AM
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deermousie
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quote:
deermousie, I'd like to hear more about how you believe he has a gambling addiction. It sounds like you believe he has an addiciton to fantasy. I'm not sure.
Sorry, I just now saw this. I don't know a lot about addictions (except people with addictions seem to have to hit bottom before they'll deal with it, and they don't seem to care if they destroy those around them, even helpless children. BIG deal breaker), except that the gambler in his addiction thinks, "Just one more time and I'll hit it big and be rich!" That win is always one gamble away but the odds are way against it ever happening. Gamblers will bet their grocery money, rent money, etc. because "I'll win and pay everything back." But they rarely ever win, and they destroy themselves and all who depend on them.
Addictions seem to all deal in fantasy, or denial. The drinker who thinks it's no big deal that they lose their jobs and families, the druggie who is casual about destroying their health and lives, and some even selling their children to buy more drugs.
Maybe someone more knowledgeable can pick this up.
_____________________________
Want to know where a certain word or phrase in the Bible is found? www.biblegateway.com Yay!
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RE: HOW DO I TELL HIM - 11/30/2008 11:58:09 AM
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delete123
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Prov27~
You can get a restraining order against him. I had to do this to my older sister and husband. Not that they visit, but they would call all the time threatening and harassing me.
The police took the report and suggested that I change my number (which I had already did, but somehow they managed to get it again.)
The police actually called them and told them to stop calling or they would go to jail if they received another call from me. I also saved their messages.
What he is doing is in the bible, living by the flesh. When you live by the flesh it reaps corruption and creates strife.
As Christians we strive to not live by the flesh but by the Spirit which produces a better fruit.
So get a no contact restraining order (that includes phone calls)
Do not falter or become faint in your mind.
DeerMousie as usual gave you some great advice.
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RE: HOW DO I TELL HIM - 11/30/2008 8:16:56 PM
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Paymeister
Posts: 27
Joined: 10/13/2007
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quote:
ORIGINAL: deermousie
... I'd go to the local shooting range and start trying out some nice little hand guns. Yeah, guns, and a permit. Because if this guy gets violent with you and you are in danger of your life, you'll have seconds to respond and the police are minutes away. Self-defense is moral if you are in danger of death. ...
I participate on a forum for those who are concerned about protecting their family - I posted a summary of the situation and their responses are pretty uniform: do something for your own self-defense, as a single woman is kind of a sitting duck even without this guy... and his behavior suggests that he could very easily turn violent. If pepper spray is all you can bring yourself to get, do it!
But Deermousie's advice is sound (and moral) and a better choice IF you're willing to commit to training - firearms are tools, NOT magic talismans. Pay particular attention to the logic: if you need help, you need it RIGHT NOW, not when the cops arrive ten minutes later (and your kids need a mom: keep yourself safe).
If you wish to view the responses on the other forum, visit http://www.defensivecarry.com/vbulletin/carry-defensive-scenarios/62942-advice-woman-who-just-broke-up.html.
My prayers are with you.
[Nothing to slam cops: they all WISH they could be right there when the bad guy arrives!]
< Message edited by Paymeister -- 11/30/2008 8:24:04 PM >
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RE: HOW DO I TELL HIM - 11/30/2008 9:06:29 PM
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delete123
Posts: 991
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Paymeister
quote:
ORIGINAL: deermousie
... I'd go to the local shooting range and start trying out some nice little hand guns. Yeah, guns, and a permit. Because if this guy gets violent with you and you are in danger of your life, you'll have seconds to respond and the police are minutes away. Self-defense is moral if you are in danger of death. ...
I participate on a forum for those who are concerned about protecting their family - I posted a summary of the situation and their responses are pretty uniform: do something for your own self-defense, as a single woman is kind of a sitting duck even without this guy... and his behavior suggests that he could very easily turn violent. If pepper spray is all you can bring yourself to get, do it!
But Deermousie's advice is sound (and moral) and a better choice IF you're willing to commit to training - firearms are tools, NOT magic talismans. Pay particular attention to the logic: if you need help, you need it RIGHT NOW, not when the cops arrive ten minutes later (and your kids need a mom: keep yourself safe).
If you wish to view the responses on the other forum, visit http://www.defensivecarry.com/vbulletin/carry-defensive-scenarios/62942-advice-woman-who-just-broke-up.html.
My prayers are with you.
[Nothing to slam cops: they all WISH they could be right there when the bad guy arrives!]
I also agree. I did not mention it, because when I was in the service (I was Army) I received a badge for expert with my weapon.
I'm sorry on that, please get trained
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RE: HOW DO I TELL HIM - 11/30/2008 9:19:10 PM
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prov2717ironsharpens
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This is scary, taking it to this level, very scary. I don't want to get a gun. I don't like them. However, I will get the pepper spray. I don't know where this will take me. He hasn't called today so I'm grateful for that. My cousin, who introduced us, told me his previous girlfriend filed a restraining order against him when she felt harrassed by him when she broke it off with him. I fussed at her asking why in the world would she introduce us not tell me about these past behaviors and patterns. She said he is a nice guy and thought things would turn around. Gee thanks alot!
I will keep you all posted. The gun and shooting range are a bit much for me at this time; however, I will look into it. Maybe I'm in denial, not too sure. I pray it doesn't come to that.
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RE: HOW DO I TELL HIM - 11/30/2008 9:32:25 PM
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narnia
Posts: 563
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quote:
his previous girlfriend filed a restraining order against him when she felt harrassed by him when she broke it off with him
He has done this before too-his behavior pattern is very predictable. He is harassing you. I would not wait to file the restraining order against him. One or two or three days of no phone calls is not enough time to show a change in behavior.
Another thing to consider..I am not trying to frighten you here..but perhaps he is taking a breather now because he is coming up with a new plan to woo you. Or he is out of money and as soon as he has money and a new plan, he will be back.
And the fact that he said this:
quote:
he will do whatever it takes to keep me. What does that mean?
Nothing good, I can assure you. Go get that restraining order.
_____________________________
Domestic Diva, according to our Forums Mother!
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RE: HOW DO I TELL HIM - 11/30/2008 10:42:14 PM
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Paymeister
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quote:
ORIGINAL: prov2717ironsharpens
This is scary, taking it to this level, very scary. I don't want to get a gun. I don't like them. ... The gun and shooting range are a bit much for me at this time; however, I will look into it. Maybe I'm in denial, not too sure. I pray it doesn't come to that.
Goodness! We pray it doesn't come to that, too, for you or any of us! But we also pray we don't get in a wreck, yet we still carry insurance. The Lord is in the business of protecting us, but it would the height of arrogance for us to insist that He use someone else to do the job - a bit like saying, "Lord, feed my family" and demand charity instead of following His direction to go to work. I pray for safety on the road... and I drive cautiously. I pray for my family to be fed... and I go to work. I pray for my family's protection... and I have a sidearm.
I also understand that shifting one's perspective is really, really tough. Go for the pepper spray for now, and keep www.defensivecarry.com as a reference should you want support in thinking through these issues. Another excellent resource is www.corneredcat.com.
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RE: HOW DO I TELL HIM - 12/1/2008 10:42:06 PM
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Focusing
Posts: 6007
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quote:
You've told him you need space and he's not giving you any. That's a lot of disrespect. He's doing this to meet his needs, not yours. In fact, he's demanding you meet his needs when it's hurtful to you. He's just revealed himself for the hurtful, demanding person he is, and it's ugly.
His behavior lacks love and self-control.
I have been and will continue to pray for you and your safety. I agree with getting the restraining order. Be sure to file it in all the appropriate county and city police offices. The police did nothing to help me when my ex threatened me in a city where it was not filed, despite the fact it was filed with the county sheriff's office, and despite the fact I had a copy in my hand to show them. Dot the i's and cross the t's.
Paymeister has given you some excellent resources. Another option would be to contact a women's center. You can usually just google to find a local one. They offer classes and counseling, as well as providing advice and free help in filing restraining/protective orders.
_____________________________
Instead of a gem, or even a flower, we should cast the gift of a loving thought into the heart of a friend. That would be giving as the angels give.
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RE: HOW DO I TELL HIM - 12/3/2008 10:08:54 PM
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prov2717ironsharpens
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I'm okay and he's relaxed alot. I won't lie and say I don't miss his constant calling and pursuing. Maybe I'm weird or psychotic but I do miss him. This is very very difficult and I know I need to stand my ground. HELP ME. I'm so glad I'm a very busy person and usually at night I'm exhausted so sleep comes easy. I once was at a place where it didn't bother me as much that I didn't have a man to call my own. Now I've been sucked back in to this love thing and I'm mad. How do I turn it off?
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RE: HOW DO I TELL HIM - 12/7/2008 1:18:33 PM
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xoxmelxox
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It sounds to me like he is just looking for someone to take care of HIM. He is not responsible & sounds like he has a lot of growing up to do. I would run. After 4 years of being engaged, what makes you think he's going to change his ways at all? Just be careful.
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RE: HOW DO I TELL HIM - 12/7/2008 8:43:37 PM
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deermousie
Posts: 1946
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quote:
ORIGINAL: prov2717ironsharpens
I'm okay and he's relaxed alot. I won't lie and say I don't miss his constant calling and pursuing. Maybe I'm weird or psychotic but I do miss him. This is very very difficult and I know I need to stand my ground. HELP ME. I'm so glad I'm a very busy person and usually at night I'm exhausted so sleep comes easy. I once was at a place where it didn't bother me as much that I didn't have a man to call my own. Now I've been sucked back in to this love thing and I'm mad. How do I turn it off?
You were engaged to him for four years - it's going to take a while to grieve the loss of a close relationship. Every day will usually be a little better. A day or two will backtrack, but the overall direction is towards health and peace. Just stick it out. I would give this 6 months to a year to resolve itself, but 6 months to a year from now you'll be free and glad you did it.
I'm glad you're busy; it helps. You could go find a good book or Bible study at a Christian bookstore on marriage and see what you can do to prepare yourself for a healthy marriage. And start getting into your Bible every day if you haven't been already and let God teach you. Three chapters a day will take you through it in a year... and then start over. Every time you'll see something new; I don't know how God does that, but He does. This might be a good time to get more involved in your church, and exercise is a nature moodlifter.
God bless you, dear one! May God give you the desires of your heart in His perfect timing. (((Hugs)))
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Want to know where a certain word or phrase in the Bible is found? www.biblegateway.com Yay!
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RE: HOW DO I TELL HIM - 12/8/2008 1:33:03 PM
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ames01
Posts: 158
Joined: 5/11/2007
Status: offline
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quote:
I won't lie and say I don't miss his constant calling and pursuing. Maybe I'm weird or psychotic but I do miss him. This is very very difficult and I know I need to stand my ground.
When I read this part of your post, I felt a little bit of caution. I may very well be off base, but I think it's possible that he could be trying to manipulate you. By calling non-stop at first and then not calling much, he could be in a sense playing hard to get. You mentioned earlier that you thought he might try to woo you back. This might be his way of doing that, by trying to get you to miss him. As I said, I could be wrong, but it's something to watch out for.
quote:
I once was at a place where it didn't bother me as much that I didn't have a man to call my own. Now I've been sucked back in to this love thing and I'm mad. How do I turn it off?
I wish I had a good answer for you on this one, I really do.  I could have written these same words a few months ago. The thing that has helped me the most, although it's probably not what you would like to hear right now, is time. The hurt and the longing will be with you for a while, but over time they will change and become more manageable. Working on forgiving your ex (which also takes time) and strengthening your own relationship with Jesus will also help.
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RE: HOW DO I TELL HIM - 12/8/2008 1:50:40 PM
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mrf084
Posts: 103
Joined: 12/14/2007
Status: offline
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Step away and get perspective from God seems to be a theme. I can tell you from hard won experience that this is good advice. While it won't be easy it is generally quite necessary. Our emotions and body chemistry cloud our judgement and drown out the still small voice of God. Step a way from the car before it becomes a runaway.
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RE: HOW DO I TELL HIM - 12/14/2008 12:10:40 AM
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Focusing
Posts: 6007
Status: offline
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prov2717, still praying for you ... that you are staying strong, and that you feel the Lord's touch
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Instead of a gem, or even a flower, we should cast the gift of a loving thought into the heart of a friend. That would be giving as the angels give.
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