RE: What are you doing to prepare for marriage?

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RE: What are you doing to prepare for marriage?

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RE: What are you doing to prepare for marriage? - 9/12/2008 9:22:18 PM

ChoirDJ

Posts: 473
Joined: 6/15/2006
From: So Cal
Status: offline

I Just finished reading "I Kissed Dating Goodbye" today. I've had a lot of time to think about what went wrong in my marriage over the years and today I struggled with feelings of despair over all the mistakes I made. I couldn't help but feel how differently things might have turned out for me if I had been humble enough to listen to those around me and give myself the time I needed to mature before getting married. I can't imagine how the Israelites felt after being brought back from exile to see the ruins their disobedience brought about. I wonder if their excitement about being free and back in their homeland was eclipsed by the aftermath and ruins. I guess it depends on one's perspective. There are a lot of similarities between going through a divorce and being carried away in exile. We can get stuck in grief over the ruins in the past or we can be excited about implementing what we learned while we were in exile.

I had to make a conscious decision to focus on the postive things that came out of the marriage like my girls, the ministry that I am in, and of course, a lot of wisdom. I'm currently building a friendship with someone and I am looking forward to doing things right this time around if it evolves into something more.

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"Sin will take you further than you intended to go, keep you there longer than you intended to stay, and cost you more than you intended to spend." Got it?

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RE: What are you doing to prepare for marriage? - 9/13/2008 12:56:18 AM

Skopos1

Posts: 150
Joined: 4/13/2005
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Hmm,
To be honest I don't sit around much thinking of ways to prepare for marriage. I try to better myself for the sake of growth and as relationships come I learn and grow regardless of whether they lead to marriage or not. I think it can be possible to fixate on marriage so much that we forget to live life and grow for the sake of growth itself and not for the sake of having a successful significant other in the unknown future. I think the more I focus on growing as a person in God rather than what It may be like to be married the better. But its true to everything there is a balance.

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RE: What are you doing to prepare for marriage? - 9/13/2008 10:37:00 PM

BrknFree

Posts: 17
Joined: 8/26/2006
Status: offline

I agree. After my divorce I went through so many phases (grief cycle). Then all I wanted was to be with someone. I have only dated once in the last 6 years and that turned out to be a really bad call. Since then God has taken me on a journey of inner healing. I can say right now that it is ok if I never marry until my daughter grows up, but my heart desire is to be married. My concern for now is just to be in the center of His will and raise my daughter up to be the woman He has called her to be. Right now I am taking a class at church and we are reading Sacred Romance by Brent Curtis and John Eldredge. It is revealing more of the hurts that have not been taken care of to make me a more complete and whole person.

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