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Covaan_Meshuga -> RE: Daddy's taking us to the zoo tomorrow, zoo tomorrow, zoo tomorrow (7/14/2008 12:31:56 PM)
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Yes, Kat_D, you are right: while the same granddaughter was out of the country helping build a home, concerns for her being away brought my mind back to that day, so I took that time to start this thread. I want to warn parents and grandparents about what can happen. I have done this before.
Personal experience definitely influences actions. For me, personal experience told me that the zoo, of all places, was a safe place, so I was not as vigilant as I should have been there. I assumed that everyone there was good and thought nothing of a man I saw twice behind us.
Had I been smart, I would not have become nervous about him being there upon the second time, but I would have verbally acknowledged his presence by looking him in firmly the eye and saying a firm hello, while he saw me taking in his appearance. That would have likely been warning enough to make him back off. That would have been my weapon, and the third time, with him reaching for my granddaughter behind my back would not likely have happened.
Would I have done the same if it had been a woman? To be honest, no. If it had been a woman, I would have been far more confrontational upon that third time. No one but NO ONE makes any move that indicates they are going to harm my child or grandchild without my confronting them.
A woman? I would have gotten between her and my grandchildren and if she had not been physically wounded, if she persisted, she would have at least been emotionally wounded.
Because it was a man, I ran with the children. If it had been a woman, well, I was younger and much stronger then. But I would not give 2¢ for either the emotional or physical security of a woman, had he been a woman.
And Kernsfamily, as much as I enjoy your posts and appreciate what I see in you through your posts, when it comes to the safety of any child, I don't give half a hoot what the career of the perp is or what future loss they may have to suffer. A child is an innocent child, and when any adult hurts a child, it is never ever the fault of the child, nor should the adult be believed when they claim that the child instigated the harm they did.
Manda, I didn't realize that my granddaughter didn't know the full details of what happened, until I brought up this thread to her last night. And your "what if" scenarios? I used to do that with my children. It's a great exercise.
JuliaHop, none of us actually go to the downtown library here, because no one is safe there. I remember when I thought that the library was completely safe for children in Minneapolis, and I would take them to the wonderful children's sections they had there, then feel free to go find a book for myself. No more!
Pbaribeault, I live in a little city that is particularly unsafe. We all know it. We talk about every place being the same, but the fact is that when new people come to my little city, they look at me wide-eyed and say, "I never believed what I had heard about this place, but it really is that bad, isn't it?" Yes, it is. And this conversation just happened again last week.
I agree with CoeurdeLeon. Here, I would not leave a young child or young children alone at a table in a restaurant. They would not go alone to a public restroom. They must be watched at all times while playing in the park. That's just the way it is here.
Sunnymom, thank you for the book and video recommendations!
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