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RE: teenage son wants an ear ring - 7/9/2008 4:00:57 PM
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faroukfarouk
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L'smom:
Yes I think frankly you are being just a bit old fashioned. Also, what if he is quite committed to doing his ear(s) and you won't let him or even advise him about the procedure and he ended up trying unwisely to pierce them in front of a mirror with a unsterile needle and got a bad infection, would you wish you had at least advised him about the hygiene aspect of it? That's why some parents prefer to take their son to the jeweler to have it done safely and hygienically.
It's your call as a parent.
But really it ought not to be a big deal. (My two cents'.)
Take care.
quote:
ORIGINAL: Leslie_JnJs_mom
I told him no of course. Then I started to wonder if I am being too old fashioned. It wont change my no but am I too old fashioned?
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Don't trust the appearance of things.
(I'm a guy. Some tattoo designs look nice, though...but I haven't worn my earrings lately. So, think the lady in the avatar is my sister?)
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RE: teenage son wants an ear ring - 7/9/2008 4:13:41 PM
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faroukfarouk
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Jenny Fair
Fine, okay.
And if you are willing to live with the consequences of him catching something from a dirty needle, well I guess that's your priority in order to make some sort of personal point about earrings. Every family has its priorities I guess.
I think it's taking it a bit far, but hey I'm not you. lol
Take care.
quote:
ORIGINAL: Jenny-Fair
Kids will always want to do things they shouldn't--we can't refuse to set rules figuring that they will do what they want anyway. That is, quite frankly, ridiculous. And if they do something stupid (disobey) and suffer from it, it's called consequences, and they need to figure out that consequences exist.
Btw, what is WRONG with old-fashioned? And what on earth is WRONG about making a child wait until they are 18 to do something the parent doesn't approve of? I mean, for pete's sake, it's an earring, not water 
_____________________________
Trust the Bible.
Trust the Lord.
Don't trust the appearance of things.
(I'm a guy. Some tattoo designs look nice, though...but I haven't worn my earrings lately. So, think the lady in the avatar is my sister?)
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RE: teenage son wants an ear ring - 7/9/2008 4:15:33 PM
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Jenny-Fair
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I have asked you about this dirty needle thing before. Just WHAT do you think a kid is going to 'catch' from a sewing needle?!
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RE: teenage son wants an ear ring - 7/9/2008 4:18:54 PM
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faroukfarouk
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Jenny F:
Well I guess that one could ask the question the other way round:
Why do jeweler's bother to sterilize their piercing equipment, and why do local governments increasingly regulate places that do piercings? There must be a reason for it, related to what people who know more than me describe as hygiene.
Take care.
quote:
ORIGINAL: Jenny-Fair
I have asked you about this dirty needle thing before. Just WHAT do you think a kid is going to 'catch' from a sewing needle?!
_____________________________
Trust the Bible.
Trust the Lord.
Don't trust the appearance of things.
(I'm a guy. Some tattoo designs look nice, though...but I haven't worn my earrings lately. So, think the lady in the avatar is my sister?)
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RE: teenage son wants an ear ring - 7/9/2008 4:27:34 PM
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Jenny-Fair
Posts: 6284
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Meaning you have no idea? Well, let's think about this...if a kid is using a sewing needle, which would definitely be the best way to go, and that needle has been used for sewing (because he stole it from my sewing box), or he bought it new (or stole it from a store), then basically his biggest risk is either tetanus (for which most people are vaccinated) or plain old dirt (which will cause a painful infection that can be taken care of by antibiotics). And this is assuming said child is too stupid to light a match and sterilize a needle (trust me, neither of my children are that stupid).
The reason BUSINESSES have rules is because they deal with more than one customer. That brings in the possibility of transferring germs from one person to another. The only way that would happen in your scenario is if there were more than one child being stupid at the same time. Not that this never happens, but again, neither of my kids would do that. One of them, btw, is a trained field medic. He is completely anal about bloodborne pathogens. The other is not a field medic but thinks Monk is someone to emulate. So, no, I would definitely not worry about this happening with my kids.
Although, to be frank, if one of them wanted an earring and I said no, I am pretty sure they would simply complain a little and then wait until they were out of my home. And if a child is so immature that they would pierce their own ear, then we have bigger problems than a dirty sewing needle.
Again, we cannot refuse to say no out of fear that our kids won't obey us. Your logic does not follow to other situations, because it is fundamentally faulty.
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Ziva: It is possible. I do not remember all their names.
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RE: teenage son wants an ear ring - 7/9/2008 4:34:45 PM
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faroukfarouk
Posts: 874
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Jenny F:
Fine if that's your reasoning. It's your call.
You've mentioned some possible infections, I guess you've answered it.
Your starting point is that boys' earrings are a definite no-no.
For some people, the no-no side of it isn't especially important, and they would attach more wieght to the infection possibility side of things. Thus if they think it really isn't important if their son wears and earring or not, and if it's not important to insist, then maybe it's sensible to let him do it if he really wants to do it.
You have your reasoning, fine.
Other people also have theirs. You see?
Take care.
quote:
ORIGINAL: Jenny-Fair
Meaning you have no idea? Well, let's think about this...if a kid is using a sewing needle, which would definitely be the best way to go, and that needle has been used for sewing (because he stole it from my sewing box), or he bought it new (or stole it from a store), then basically his biggest risk is either tetanus (for which most people are vaccinated) or plain old dirt (which will cause a painful infection that can be taken care of by antibiotics). And this is assuming said child is too stupid to light a match and sterilize a needle (trust me, neither of my children are that stupid).
The reason BUSINESSES have rules is because they deal with more than one customer. That brings in the possibility of transferring germs from one person to another. The only way that would happen in your scenario is if there were more than one child being stupid at the same time. Not that this never happens, but again, neither of my kids would do that. One of them, btw, is a trained field medic. He is completely anal about bloodborne pathogens. The other is not a field medic but thinks Monk is someone to emulate. So, no, I would definitely not worry about this happening with my kids.
Although, to be frank, if one of them wanted an earring and I said no, I am pretty sure they would simply complain a little and then wait until they were out of my home. And if a child is so immature that they would pierce their own ear, then we have bigger problems than a dirty sewing needle.
Again, we cannot refuse to say no out of fear that our kids won't obey us. Your logic does not follow to other situations, because it is fundamentally faulty.
_____________________________
Trust the Bible.
Trust the Lord.
Don't trust the appearance of things.
(I'm a guy. Some tattoo designs look nice, though...but I haven't worn my earrings lately. So, think the lady in the avatar is my sister?)
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RE: teenage son wants an ear ring - 7/9/2008 4:38:12 PM
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Jenny-Fair
Posts: 6284
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From: WA
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If other parents don't mind earrings on their sons, and say yes because they don't mind, that is no problem. But to say yes out of fear is bad parenting, and I don't think many people do that.
I think it's awful that you seem to assume most teens would go behind their parents' backs, to be honest.
_____________________________
Tony: Ziva, did you kill Houdini?
Ziva: It is possible. I do not remember all their names.
My Blog
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RE: teenage son wants an ear ring - 7/9/2008 4:44:53 PM
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faroukfarouk
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Well, exactly: "If other parents don't mind earrings on their sons". That's what I meant. Lots of boys have them, including in Christian families, and many people think it's no big deal; other families prefer not, which is fine as well.
Re. 'fear', behind one's back, etc: I guess one wouldn't refuse to keep the safety lid on the medicine bottle because kids would "surely" not be curious. It's all a precaution. I'm not sure how far that kind of argument can be taken.
It's perfectly fine if for you there is some special reason why boys 'ought' not to have it done.
Other parents may really not mind either way, and if there are some mitigating factors as well to take into consideration, well, they might influence their thinking as well.
You see, not everyone thinks the same, but, hey, we are all different, even though we may have similar theological views, etc.
Take care, and God bless your family.
quote:
ORIGINAL: Jenny-Fair
If other parents don't mind earrings on their sons, and say yes because they don't mind, that is no problem. But to say yes out of fear is bad parenting, and I don't think many people do that.
I think it's awful that you seem to assume most teens would go behind their parents' backs, to be honest.
_____________________________
Trust the Bible.
Trust the Lord.
Don't trust the appearance of things.
(I'm a guy. Some tattoo designs look nice, though...but I haven't worn my earrings lately. So, think the lady in the avatar is my sister?)
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RE: teenage son wants an ear ring - 7/9/2008 4:48:14 PM
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faroukfarouk
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Calea:
Well if by 18 all that a parent has had to contend with is the desire for an earring, then s/he has done very well!
Take care.
quote:
ORIGINAL: Calea37
quote:
ORIGINAL: Jenny-Fair
Kids will always want to do things they shouldn't--we can't refuse to set rules figuring that they will do what they want anyway. That is, quite frankly, ridiculous. And if they do something stupid (disobey) and suffer from it, it's called consequences, and they need to figure out that consequences exist.
Btw, what is WRONG with old-fashioned? And what on earth is WRONG about making a child wait until they are 18 to do something the parent doesn't approve of? I mean, for pete's sake, it's an earring, not water
Amen! 
_____________________________
Trust the Bible.
Trust the Lord.
Don't trust the appearance of things.
(I'm a guy. Some tattoo designs look nice, though...but I haven't worn my earrings lately. So, think the lady in the avatar is my sister?)
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RE: teenage son wants an ear ring - 7/9/2008 4:51:14 PM
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Jenny-Fair
Posts: 6284
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From: WA
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I have never said other parents shouldn't allow it. I am simply saying that a parent who disapproves shouldn't be made to feel as if the are endangering their child's health by saying no, and that I guess I have more faith in kids than you do because I don't think most would go behind their parents' backs. And that's even though my mother did exactly that in this situation--she pierced her own ears, with ice, a potato and a sterilized needle. But she was an EXTREMELY rebellious teenager. And her mother would have been less respectable had she acquiesced out of fear that my mom would make a bad decision.
What if it were drugs? Would we be better off buying our kids clean hypodermics so that they could avoid contracting a disease? My brother has Hepatitis from sharing needles...but I still would say the answer is no.
Perhaps the answer is better parenting to begin with, rather than parenting in such a way that you have a teenager that you are afraid of!
_____________________________
Tony: Ziva, did you kill Houdini?
Ziva: It is possible. I do not remember all their names.
My Blog
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RE: teenage son wants an ear ring - 7/9/2008 5:00:23 PM
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faroukfarouk
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Jenny F:
Thanks for your further comments.
I guess to them I would say, earrings are earrings, and drugs are drugs; apples are apples and oranges are oranges. The parent of a boy with an earring isn't obliged to be someone who aids and abtes drug abuse, etc. There are so many issues with young people that I guess it takes wisdom on a case by case basis. I'm sure you wouldn't disagree with that.
In the end, as they approach 18, they have to begin to learn how to make their own decisions. I think that instead of: Hey, no, no, no! until 18 and then: wildness, anything goes; instead:
"Look Zac, if you want to learn to ride a Harley Davidson, you should have many lessons, you should learn the rules of the road, you should decide if you can afford the gas, etc. If you want to wear earrings, think about it, do you really want to? if you do it, make sure it's done by a professional with a sterile needle, and if you don't know where a good jeweler is, we can look in the 'phone book." I guess that is how some parents would proceed, right? in the belief that it is sensible to get their growing teen gradually to think for himself and take responsibility for himself.
Some parents would far rather he got an earring than a Harley-Davidson (lol)
quote:
ORIGINAL: Jenny-Fair
I have never said other parents shouldn't allow it. I am simply saying that a parent who disapproves shouldn't be made to feel as if the are endangering their child's health by saying no, and that I guess I have more faith in kids than you do because I don't think most would go behind their parents' backs. And that's even though my mother did exactly that in this situation--she pierced her own ears, with ice, a potato and a sterilized needle. But she was an EXTREMELY rebellious teenager. And her mother would have been less respectable had she acquiesced out of fear that my mom would make a bad decision.
What if it were drugs? Would we be better off buying our kids clean hypodermics so that they could avoid contracting a disease? My brother has Hepatitis from sharing needles...but I still would say the answer is no.
Perhaps the answer is better parenting to begin with, rather than parenting in such a way that you have a teenager that you are afraid of!
_____________________________
Trust the Bible.
Trust the Lord.
Don't trust the appearance of things.
(I'm a guy. Some tattoo designs look nice, though...but I haven't worn my earrings lately. So, think the lady in the avatar is my sister?)
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RE: teenage son wants an ear ring - 7/9/2008 5:06:10 PM
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Jenny-Fair
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From: WA
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But the earring decision has nothing whatsoever to do with safety.
_____________________________
Tony: Ziva, did you kill Houdini?
Ziva: It is possible. I do not remember all their names.
My Blog
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RE: teenage son wants an ear ring - 7/9/2008 5:10:24 PM
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faroukfarouk
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JennyF:
For some ppl the safety aspect wouldn't be very important, maybe.
Admittedly there is little direct link between a bike and a hole pierced in one's son's ear.
Admittedly also, many parents wouldn't particularly worry if he had a hole pierced in his ear, but would worry a lot about a bike accident.
So maybe you are right that I am talking apples and oranges as well. I guess it proves that people trying to look at issues honestly can arrive at different viewpoints.
Take care.
quote:
ORIGINAL: Jenny-Fair
But the earring decision has nothing whatsoever to do with safety.
_____________________________
Trust the Bible.
Trust the Lord.
Don't trust the appearance of things.
(I'm a guy. Some tattoo designs look nice, though...but I haven't worn my earrings lately. So, think the lady in the avatar is my sister?)
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RE: teenage son wants an ear ring - 7/9/2008 5:12:55 PM
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Jenny-Fair
Posts: 6284
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: WA
Status: offline
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Believing something is wrong and believing something is dangerous are two totally different situations.
_____________________________
Tony: Ziva, did you kill Houdini?
Ziva: It is possible. I do not remember all their names.
My Blog
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RE: teenage son wants an ear ring - 7/9/2008 5:15:03 PM
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faroukfarouk
Posts: 874
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JennyF:
I agree.
But if you are saying that for a boy to have an earring is always 'wrong', then I don't agree. (Even some men in the Bible had their ear pierced. Ps. 40, the Messianic 'mine ears hast thou opened' ; Hebrew 'opened' = digged , i.e., pierced).
quote:
ORIGINAL: Jenny-Fair
Believing something is wrong and believing something is dangerous are two totally different situations.
_____________________________
Trust the Bible.
Trust the Lord.
Don't trust the appearance of things.
(I'm a guy. Some tattoo designs look nice, though...but I haven't worn my earrings lately. So, think the lady in the avatar is my sister?)
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RE: teenage son wants an ear ring - 7/9/2008 5:16:52 PM
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Jenny-Fair
Posts: 6284
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: WA
Status: offline
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I have already stated, repeatedly, that I don't care what other people do about piercings. I don't think ANYONE has said that other people's kids should be denied them.
_____________________________
Tony: Ziva, did you kill Houdini?
Ziva: It is possible. I do not remember all their names.
My Blog
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RE: teenage son wants an ear ring - 7/9/2008 5:18:26 PM
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faroukfarouk
Posts: 874
Joined: 4/16/2008
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JennyF:
Well, fine.
I must have misunderstood about what you meant when you talked about things being 'wrong', in relation to this subject. So many boys have their ears pierced, including in Christian families, anyway.
Take care.
quote:
ORIGINAL: Jenny-Fair
I have already stated, repeatedly, that I don't care what other people do about piercings. I don't think ANYONE has said that other people's kids should be denied them.
_____________________________
Trust the Bible.
Trust the Lord.
Don't trust the appearance of things.
(I'm a guy. Some tattoo designs look nice, though...but I haven't worn my earrings lately. So, think the lady in the avatar is my sister?)
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RE: teenage son wants an ear ring - 7/9/2008 6:00:31 PM
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delete123
Posts: 973
Joined: 6/1/2005
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quote:
ORIGINAL: iluvatar
quote:
ORIGINAL: Sideways]
I would probably make any child of mine wait, to see if it's a passing fancy or if they really wanted it. I would also ask why they wanted it so much.
Earrings are also non-permanent. You can take it out and the hole will fill in.
-Dan.
Sorry Dan~
My ears were pierced when I was 11 y/o I am now 47 and the holes have not closed. I can slip in a pair of earrings if I choose.
My son however will have to wait until I die before he pierces his ear, tongue, eyebrow, or any other part of his body. The answer is Absolutely not. If he wants to make a statement about himself, there are much more better ways than this. MHO
So think again
CRH
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