RE: Woes on Tipping in Restaurants (Full Version)

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kernsfamily -> RE: Woes on Tipping in Restaurants (7/10/2008 12:07:33 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: GregandJenny

no, but she expects it to be brought out without asking.
G


ranch dressing with pancakes? to be brought out without asking?

that's being a bit too "demanding"....

i know of VERY few servers who read their customer's minds (and even then, their ability to do so was very limited....)



zoebob -> RE: Woes on Tipping in Restaurants (7/10/2008 12:08:11 PM)

I didn't necessarily mind having to run all over for a customre for legitimate needs/desire and I think I presented the attitude that it's OK. However, when you have to neglect 3 other tables to do that and you know from experience that those runners are not generally good tippers you would rather be able to focus on the 3 tables that aren't like that.



HighPlainsDrifter -> RE: Woes on Tipping in Restaurants (7/10/2008 12:11:54 PM)

Everytime I've been out to eat with someone rude or demanding of servers, they've also been a bad or non-existent tipper. I try not to eat out with them again. I especially dislike being out with people who are rude to staff.



woodsandfield -> RE: Woes on Tipping in Restaurants (7/10/2008 12:32:36 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: GregandJenny

no, but she expects it to be brought out without asking.


G


I think you were either trying to be humorous or your sister is
a regular customer somewhere.
I agree with you attitude is really important.
I enjoy eating at home more now, the quality of the food can be trusted,
I serve myself well and I'm not at all upset if someone ( or me ) wants some unusual condiment. Just kiddin [:D]



BlueAdept -> RE: Woes on Tipping in Restaurants (7/10/2008 1:27:36 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: zoebob

I didn't necessarily mind having to run all over for a customre for legitimate needs/desire and I think I presented the attitude that it's OK. However, when you have to neglect 3 other tables to do that and you know from experience that those runners are not generally good tippers you would rather be able to focus on the 3 tables that aren't like that.


I have never been a server, but I could see if I had a repeat customer that had tipped well in the past, or tipped poorly in the past I would tend to treat the one great and the other as "needed." I would not ignore, but nor would I go above and beyond. That might not be "right" but if you know you are going to get "nothing" from one and you think you can get tipped pretty well from the other 3 tables, it is somewhat natural to "take care of business."



doinkdom -> RE: Woes on Tipping in Restaurants (7/10/2008 2:54:40 PM)

I tip and I tip well. Most women waitressing the restaurants I go to are single moms working their guts out to provide for their kids.

I can come off of an extra dollar to tip. I do not tip based on the chef. If you keep me in sweet-tea...I'll keep you good tips.[;)]

You have got to be some kinda devil-waitstaff for me not to tip.

And if I hog the table for more than an hour yacking with friends, I tip even more since I kept the table from being turned over to someone else.



bzirk -> RE: Woes on Tipping in Restaurants (7/10/2008 3:28:21 PM)

I was a server one summer when I was in college. That was enough. I think that's one of the toughest jobs. So glad I got to do it for a couple of reasons. One of them is it made me think twice about not studying hard in college, 'cause I did not want to be a server. The other is that it's helped me appreciate servers and giving them the benefit of the doubt when tipping. I remember the cooks causing some problems when I was serving, and there were some other things out of my control that impacted my service and therefore my tips. So I try to remember that maybe the server is having those problem or just having a bad day. It takes a whole lot for me to leave less than 20% or to tip very low to make a point, and usually, I verbalize why I left a lousy tip so they know it was not just to stiff them. I want it clear they did not do their jobs. BTW, I've only done that a couple of times in my life.

For someone just not to tip or to tip an insultingly low amount is rude. Now if someone is honestly caught without the money to tip, they can always go back and give the server the tip later. There is no excuse to not tip unless something is radically wrong with the server.



doinkdom -> RE: Woes on Tipping in Restaurants (7/10/2008 3:35:30 PM)

I had a girlfriend once tell me that I left too big a tip...

I told her that if and when she served me, I'd be sure to make up for that.

[8D]

yeh...I could've handled it better...but geez[8|] it was one of those very inexpensive mexican restaurants that if you tip based on total of the bill...the waiter would get like a quarter and he still did just as much work.



bzirk -> RE: Woes on Tipping in Restaurants (7/10/2008 3:37:42 PM)

My husband likes to always tip well, and he loves to pay for someone's meal anonymously (including the tip).



shadowspring -> RE: Woes on Tipping in Restaurants (7/10/2008 5:23:27 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: HighPlainsDrifter

Everytime I've been out to eat with someone rude or demanding of servers, they've also been a bad or non-existent tipper. I try not to eat out with them again. I especially dislike being out with people who are rude to staff.



Me too, HPD. That happened to me recently. I was so embarrassed. The rude person was picking up the check and expensing the meal (even though it had nothing to do with her business). I was not expecting to stop and eat, and so I had very little cash on me. I ordered accordingly.

As we were leaving I snuck back into the restaurant and gave our server all I had- only $5 (but then I had only ordered hot tea.)

The gesture of good will and embarrassment at my friend's rude behavior was probably worth more to her than my measly $5....



buckifn -> RE: Woes on Tipping in Restaurants (7/13/2008 11:27:33 PM)

quote:

quote:

he was laughing and joking with a party 3 tables over

That's not necessarily the waiter's fault. If the party at the table is keeping them there then to break away and say "I have other tables" could come across as rude to that party.


I disagree. A good waiter/waitress knows how to be social and also keep an eye on every table they are responsible for.



humbleinspirit -> RE: Woes on Tipping in Restaurants (7/13/2008 11:44:53 PM)

Earlier today, the regular restaurant that I go to the waitress was taking a lot longer than usual to wait on me. She ended up having someone else serve me instead and then apologized for not getting to me sooner, but just that a large table had come in instead. I really appreciated her honesty and I was not mad at all either.



Roberta_ -> RE: Woes on Tipping in Restaurants (7/14/2008 3:45:46 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Rumely

Personally, I just wish all establishments would just pay the workers a decent wage and charge whatever for meals, rooms, services necessary to cover it. I don't like having to calculate the math or have change handy or try to determine whether the service I am receiving at a given time is one where tipping is customary.


I agree with you! It's not that I don't like to do the math though. I think the restaurant should have to pay their employees. I would rather pay a higher price for a meal than pay the employee to do their job. It's the business owner's responsibility to pay their employees.

Yes, I do know how hard it is to work with the public. My mother was a waitress for years. I was never a waitress, but I did have jobs working in fast food and all of my jobs have involved customer service and I was not allowed to accept tips.



Christian30 -> RE: Woes on Tipping in Restaurants (7/15/2008 1:01:03 AM)

quote:

Improving the situation? How about something I grew up with; it's called customer service.
Yes, while I went to school, I did some time waitressing and I knew that if I wanted a good tip, I should:
A) approach the table in a timely manner
Translation: people don't want to sit there 10 minutes before they "catch the eye of a server"
B) Rudeness matters; if a server is unfriendly, abrupt or short with the
customers, it's going to reflect in the tip
C) Get the order right; yeah, that does matter, and bring everything: napkins, ketchup, knives, forks, spoon, sugar, creamer, etc.
I suspect that this is called " high maintenance".
D) Don't always be " cleaning up".
People go out to eat because they want a break and a chance to socialize.
A wait staff that is always cleaning up is a royal pain: it reflects in the tip.
E) The racism is BS. A good waiter/waitress will be appreciated no matter the color or race. Nothing is ever 100% or always, but the majority of the time, it's not about race but service.
F) a tip is not an entitlement, especially now, when people are cutting back on extras, good service is a basic.



Christian 30

Yes I am well aware of customer service. I my post I should have emphasized that my children give outstanding customer service because my Japanese wife trained them to be aligned with the customer service perspective practiced in her culture (which is at a much higher level than U.S.). My children are fast, polite, and are patient with multiple, closely-spaced requests. I will clarify that the racial concern is not towards the server, but I am referring to my children's recognition that some groups are picky, sometimes rude, need much attention, but then are the lousiest tippers. That just is what it is here in the melting pot of Houston.

I disagree with the last statement in this post to which I responded. A tip is an entitilement when that is the server's main income, and this is just a part of using a restaurant establishment. If a customer is wanting to "cut back" financially, they should stay out of establishments where servers are in jobs where they have to be trained and are making below minimum wage.



NoShow -> RE: Woes on Tipping in Restaurants (7/15/2008 10:52:04 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Christian30

I disagree with the last statement in this post to which I responded. A tip is an entitilement when that is the server's main income, and this is just a part of using a restaurant establishment.


But by definition it's not. An entitlement is a benefit granted by contract or law. We're not legally required to tip. Nor is the act of entering a restaurant a contract agreeing to tip.

As an ex-server, yes, I understand how much they rely on the tips, but going into it, they must have known there was no gurantee to them.



Ps103 -> RE: Woes on Tipping in Restaurants (7/15/2008 12:08:05 PM)

I have never gotten a bad server and I always tip well. At least well enough that when I go back the server remembers me and makes sure I get a table in his or her station. Himself is the same way.

I said in another thread once that if I did get a bad server--and I knew it was the server and not a back up in the kitchen or something else that was beyond his control--I would still tip, but I would leave precisely 8%, because that is what they have to pay taxes on, here. I am sure the message would get through and they would realize I wasn't just being cheap.

I cannot imagine what goes through the minds of people who do not tip, or leave really small tips for good service. If they think the bill was too high, they need to take it up with management and not take it out on the server. Or else eat at home, or go to a drive-through.

I have never been a server, but had friends that were when we were younger, and they had terrible horror stories, most of which centered on Sunday lunch. One nice restaurant in our town closed completely on Sunday because they could not get any of the servers to work then--the church crowd always stiffed them, or left two dollars for ten adults. That is shameful.

Do I wish that servers were paid well enough so that tipping was unnecessary, and reserved for extra-special service? Yes, sure. But that is not the way it is, and if we are going to eat out we just have to figure that into the equation.



Roberta_ -> RE: Woes on Tipping in Restaurants (7/15/2008 12:18:48 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Ps103
Do I wish that servers were paid well enough so that tipping was unnecessary, and reserved for extra-special service? Yes, sure. But that is not the way it is, and if we are going to eat out we just have to figure that into the equation.


Which is part of the reason that I seldom eat out.



bzirk -> RE: Woes on Tipping in Restaurants (7/15/2008 1:28:54 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Ps103

I have never gotten a bad server and I always tip well. At least well enough that when I go back the server remembers me and makes sure I get a table in his or her station. Himself is the same way.

I said in another thread once that if I did get a bad server--and I knew it was the server and not a back up in the kitchen or something else that was beyond his control--I would still tip, but I would leave precisely 8%, because that is what they have to pay taxes on, here. I am sure the message would get through and they would realize I wasn't just being cheap.

I cannot imagine what goes through the minds of people who do not tip, or leave really small tips for good service. If they think the bill was too high, they need to take it up with management and not take it out on the server. Or else eat at home, or go to a drive-through.

I have never been a server, but had friends that were when we were younger, and they had terrible horror stories, most of which centered on Sunday lunch. One nice restaurant in our town closed completely on Sunday because they could not get any of the servers to work then--the church crowd always stiffed them, or left two dollars for ten adults. That is shameful.

Do I wish that servers were paid well enough so that tipping was unnecessary, and reserved for extra-special service? Yes, sure. But that is not the way it is, and if we are going to eat out we just have to figure that into the equation.


I have a couple of kids who are and have been servers, and I've also done it when I younger. Generally servers think people who leave less than the standard tip are either cheap or bad at math. That's why I've talked to the server on the two occasions I've left a substandard tip.



Starbucks880 -> RE: Woes on Tipping in Restaurants (7/16/2008 9:05:05 PM)

Waitressing was one of the jobs that I worked when studying for my current career. A big part of the money pinch was that most of my money at the time was in lei (romanian currency) and switching to the dollar is definitely not in your favour, even today with the dollar being so ****py. I would have to say that the after church crowd had among the worst people--the very demanding and the worst tippers in the bunch--I remember more than a few times I would get pennies on the table, which I think it almost more insulting than getting nothing. I always treated people well and did my best and apologized if I got something wrong, so I didn't deserve the treatment. There also was always the annoying person who thought that shouting the order slowly would make me understand it (despite the fact I understood much more than I could speak) or talking about me in front of me as if I didn't understand (as if having an accent equaled stupidity or meant I didn't understand English). Let me say, it didn't make me want to enter a church anytime soon. I remember telling a kind paster who actually was nice and invited me to church that why should I go when it obviously didn't do people any good beyond the church doors--I eventually relented, which got me back in church. So the moral of the story is--Christians especially need to remember that they are being watched and how they treat people really does speak volumes about how a person perceives the faith.

As a result, I always tip and I always try to be patient. However, those who openly don't care about giving good service, I don't have much patience for and those are the ones who get the smaller tips (minimum I tip is 10%). But I also know enough that not treating your server like **** also will increase the liklihood of good service--and yes, the rumours are true--people in the kitchen do sometimes do stuff to rude people's food.



momma_bee -> RE: Woes on Tipping in Restaurants (7/16/2008 10:33:04 PM)

At one point, my SIL was 19 and the sole working breadwinner for the family of 5. She waitressed. Poppa was laid off, his dad just had surgery and his mom wasn't working anywhere and the other sister was 13.

Ever since then - Poppa tips very well. I have seen him leave a 5 for a $10 coffee/dessert because we sat for so long we keep other people out of the seat...

I'm a grump. If the coffee cup doesn't stay full, I take a percent off. Talk down to my babies? There goes another couple cents. But, if DeeDee spills, count on another dollar or two 'cause I didn't want to clean it.



humbleinspirit -> RE: Woes on Tipping in Restaurants (7/16/2008 10:33:49 PM)

quote:

I said in another thread once that if I did get a bad server--and I knew it was the server and not a back up in the kitchen or something else that was beyond his control--I would still tip, but I would leave precisely 8%, because that is what they have to pay taxes on, here. I am sure the message would get through and they would realize I wasn't just being cheap.


I have heard that you should always leave a tip, even a bad one. If the service is bad then they will surely get the message. If you don't leave any at all, then they might think that they forgot also.

Oh, btw regarding leaving 8%, don't forget that some restaurants take an additional 3% for the cooks/set up and clean up people/dish washers, etc. This is why some restaurants tack on 18% gratuity to your tab as well.



Roberta_ -> RE: Woes on Tipping in Restaurants (7/16/2008 11:41:58 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: humbleinspirit

quote:

I said in another thread once that if I did get a bad server--and I knew it was the server and not a back up in the kitchen or something else that was beyond his control--I would still tip, but I would leave precisely 8%, because that is what they have to pay taxes on, here. I am sure the message would get through and they would realize I wasn't just being cheap.


I have heard that you should always leave a tip, even a bad one. If the service is bad then they will surely get the message. If you don't leave any at all, then they might think that they forgot also.

Oh, btw regarding leaving 8%, don't forget that some restaurants take an additional 3% for the cooks/set up and clean up people/dish washers, etc. This is why some restaurants tack on 18% gratuity to your tab as well.


And back when my mother was waitressing, they also had to take money out of their tips for the bartenders, bussers and the host/hostess.



rhippie -> RE: Woes on Tipping in Restaurants (7/18/2008 10:10:08 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Christian30


Please be aware that servers do NOT get minimum wage to augment tipping. It is usually closer to $2 per hour. The job is often high stress, with a learning curve and training that is usually unpaid. I'm disappointed that so many people do not respect restaurant culture as it has been established in the U.S.


I'm not sure what State you're from but up here in Maine the wait staff have to make at least minimum wage with the tip factored in. They are paid something like $2.36 per hour and are supposed to report their tips to their boss who then has to verify that they make at least the required minimum of $7.25/hr. If they do not the employer is responsible for making up the difference.



zoebob -> RE: Woes on Tipping in Restaurants (7/18/2008 10:18:37 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: rhippie

quote:

ORIGINAL: Christian30


Please be aware that servers do NOT get minimum wage to augment tipping. It is usually closer to $2 per hour. The job is often high stress, with a learning curve and training that is usually unpaid. I'm disappointed that so many people do not respect restaurant culture as it has been established in the U.S.


I'm not sure what State you're from but up here in Maine the wait staff have to make at least minimum wage with the tip factored in. They are paid something like $2.36 per hour and are supposed to report their tips to their boss who then has to verify that they make at least the required minimum of $7.25/hr. If they do not the employer is responsible for making up the difference.

That's been my experience in NY and MD and PA. Also, training is usually at minimum wage and then when you start waiting tables on your own it goes down to $2.35 or whatever but you do have to report and the owner has to make sure you make at least $7.25



rhippie -> RE: Woes on Tipping in Restaurants (7/18/2008 10:22:47 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: humbleinspirit


I have heard that you should always leave a tip, even a bad one. If the service is bad then they will surely get the message. If you don't leave any at all, then they might think that they forgot also.




When I leave a "bad tip" (btw no such thing in my opinion) I usually leave $.01 along with a note stating that the service wasn't worth even $.02



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