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RE: July Game Thread - BAD ADVICE

 
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RE: July Game Thread - BAD ADVICE - 7/15/2008 8:33:13 AM   
John_O

 

Posts: 8029
Joined: 9/5/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: saraimay75

quote:

ORIGINAL: humbleinspirit

quote:

ORIGINAL: John_O

quote:

ORIGINAL: humbleinspirit

I am at the beach and want to go swimming but forgot my bathing suit, what should I do?



Hang around the changing rooms and grab the first suit that comes available. Remember though to grab both pieces if it happens to be a two piece. You wouldn't want to ruin the ensemble.


2 pieces, now why would a bathing suit have 2?


Yeah you don't need any bottoms.


LOL!!!!

_____________________________

Psalms 46:10 Be still, and know that I am God: I will be exalted among the heathen, I will be exalted in the earth.
Post #: 201
RE: July Game Thread - BAD ADVICE - 7/15/2008 8:36:06 AM   
John_O

 

Posts: 8029
Joined: 9/5/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: trinigirl722

I'd like to lose a little weight. Any suggestions?


Amputation of an unneeded limb?

Frontal lobotomy? (You may not lose much weight but you won't really care too much about it anymore)

Walk to New York?

Starve yourself for one week. No food at all. Then eat all you want for one day. Then starve yourself for another week. Repeat until you reach you're desired wieght.

_____________________________

Psalms 46:10 Be still, and know that I am God: I will be exalted among the heathen, I will be exalted in the earth.
Post #: 202
RE: July Game Thread - BAD ADVICE - 7/15/2008 1:45:42 PM   
saraimay75


Posts: 7884
Joined: 5/11/2005
From: Wherever God plants me.
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: trinigirl722

I'd like to lose a little weight. Any suggestions?


Do NOTHING (and I mean nothing)else but pray over and over and over and over...Lord take this weight away, Lord take this weight away, Lord take this weight away, Lord take this weight away, Lord take this weight away, Lord take this weight away, Lord take this weight away, Lord take this weight away, Lord take this weight away, Lord take this weight away, Lord take this weight away, Lord take this weight away... While eating the worst food for you body as possible

Then you pray over and over and over...Lord take the calories away, Lord take the calories away, Lord take the calories away, Lord take the calories away, Lord take the calories away, Lord take the calories away, Lord take the calories away, Lord take the calories away, Lord take the calories away, Lord take the calories away, Lord take the calories away, Lord take the calories away...

< Message edited by saraimay75 -- 7/15/2008 1:51:45 PM >


_____________________________

God love admiration . . . I think it annoys God if you walk by the color purple in a field somewhere and don't notice it.
~Alice Walker~

http://360.yahoo.com/saraimay75
Post #: 203
RE: July Game Thread - BAD ADVICE - 7/15/2008 2:16:49 PM   
Prairiehiker


Posts: 2568
Joined: 12/11/2007
From: The little house in the prairie
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: John_O

quote:

ORIGINAL: trinigirl722

I'd like to lose a little weight. Any suggestions?


Amputation of an unneeded limb?

Frontal lobotomy? (You may not lose much weight but you won't really care too much about it anymore)

Walk to New York?

Starve yourself for one week. No food at all. Then eat all you want for one day. Then starve yourself for another week. Repeat until you reach you're desired weight.


It's not called starving if you do it for the Lord. It's called fasting. So start fasting as soon as you can, and you'll lose weight, and be more spiritual.

Oh, get a breast reduction. That should work too. I mean, there's a couple of pounds right there. Who needs them anyway, right? So, get rid of those babies. And the hair has to come off too. Bald is beautiful, so chop a few inches and get rid of a few ounces of weight.

If you're really desperate to lose a weight, I heard you'd only weigh half of what you weigh in Mars as you would here. Much less in the moon. So, move there.

< Message edited by Prairiehiker -- 7/15/2008 2:47:59 PM >


_____________________________

O Lord my God, When I in awesome wonder,
Consider all the worlds Thy Hands have made;

Then sings my soul, my Saviour God to Thee
How great Thou art, How great Thou art.

Climbing the Bald Hill with my daughter
Post #: 204
RE: July Game Thread - BAD ADVICE - 7/16/2008 12:43:37 AM   
trinigirl722


Posts: 331
Joined: 4/8/2007
From: Dallas, TX
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: John_O

quote:

ORIGINAL: trinigirl722

I'd like to lose a little weight. Any suggestions?


Amputation of an unneeded limb?



Now why didn't I think of that????

OK, thanks everyone for the great suggestions. I'm praying and praying and praying, getting ready to start fasting, have made my appointments with the hair salon and scheduled my hospital visit, and I'm currently checking on how I can get a seat on the next space shuttle. When I've done that, I'll put on my Nikes and start heading to New York ... right after I finish this chocolate ice cream cone. Boy I sure am glad for this great advice column ....
Post #: 205
RE: July Game Thread - BAD ADVICE - 7/16/2008 1:48:18 AM   
saraimay75


Posts: 7884
Joined: 5/11/2005
From: Wherever God plants me.
Status: offline
How do I get myself on the the national news???

_____________________________

God love admiration . . . I think it annoys God if you walk by the color purple in a field somewhere and don't notice it.
~Alice Walker~

http://360.yahoo.com/saraimay75
Post #: 206
RE: July Game Thread - BAD ADVICE - 7/16/2008 9:36:19 AM   
JustJeannie


Posts: 4544
Joined: 6/14/2007
From: the state of confusion
Status: online
quote:

ORIGINAL: trinigirl722

quote:

ORIGINAL: John_O

quote:

ORIGINAL: trinigirl722

I'd like to lose a little weight. Any suggestions?


Amputation of an unneeded limb?



Now why didn't I think of that????

OK, thanks everyone for the great suggestions. I'm praying and praying and praying, getting ready to start fasting, have made my appointments with the hair salon and scheduled my hospital visit, and I'm currently checking on how I can get a seat on the next space shuttle. When I've done that, I'll put on my Nikes and start heading to New York ... right after I finish this chocolate ice cream cone. Boy I sure am glad for this great advice column ....


OK, I just had to say that was truly LOL funny........

_____________________________

Jeannie
Post #: 207
RE: July Game Thread - BAD ADVICE - 7/16/2008 11:30:51 AM   
John_O

 

Posts: 8029
Joined: 9/5/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: saraimay75

How do I get myself on the the national news???


I can't post any of my advice on this one without getting myself on the national news. Sorry!

_____________________________

Psalms 46:10 Be still, and know that I am God: I will be exalted among the heathen, I will be exalted in the earth.
Post #: 208
RE: July Game Thread - BAD ADVICE - 7/16/2008 12:03:24 PM   
.Pammy


Posts: 3978
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: PA, USA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: John_O

quote:

ORIGINAL: saraimay75

How do I get myself on the the national news???


I can't post any of my advice on this one without getting myself on the national news. Sorry!

And, what? The Overwhelming Humility is preventing you from doing that?

_____________________________

Pam


"Sweet-talkers win at singles' bars and in politics ... often with similar outcomes for the listener."
Post #: 209
RE: July Game Thread - BAD ADVICE - 7/16/2008 12:05:16 PM   
ShallbeRebuilt


Posts: 2103
Joined: 11/8/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: .Pammy

quote:

ORIGINAL: John_O

quote:

ORIGINAL: saraimay75

How do I get myself on the the national news???


I can't post any of my advice on this one without getting myself on the national news. Sorry!

And, what? The Overwhelming Humility is preventing you from doing that?


Oooohhh...very good shot, Pammy! *high fives you*.

besiderself
Post #: 210
RE: July Game Thread - BAD ADVICE - 7/16/2008 12:06:47 PM   
.Pammy


Posts: 3978
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: PA, USA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: besiderself

quote:

ORIGINAL: .Pammy

quote:

ORIGINAL: John_O

quote:

ORIGINAL: saraimay75

How do I get myself on the the national news???


I can't post any of my advice on this one without getting myself on the national news. Sorry!

And, what? The Overwhelming Humility is preventing you from doing that?


Oooohhh...very good shot, Pammy! *high fives you*.

besiderself

Why thank you. *bows cordially*

_____________________________

Pam


"Sweet-talkers win at singles' bars and in politics ... often with similar outcomes for the listener."
Post #: 211
RE: July Game Thread - BAD ADVICE - 7/16/2008 1:19:25 PM   
John_O

 

Posts: 8029
Joined: 9/5/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: .Pammy

quote:

ORIGINAL: John_O

quote:

ORIGINAL: saraimay75

How do I get myself on the the national news???


I can't post any of my advice on this one without getting myself on the national news. Sorry!

And, what? The Overwhelming Humility is preventing you from doing that?


No the OH has still not found it's way back home. . It's just that all the wasy I know to make the national news are national security threats. We just don't talk about such things without attracting attention

I don't think the OH would mind me being nationally spanked for being a bad boy.

_____________________________

Psalms 46:10 Be still, and know that I am God: I will be exalted among the heathen, I will be exalted in the earth.
Post #: 212
RE: July Game Thread - BAD ADVICE - 7/17/2008 12:14:15 AM   
trinigirl722


Posts: 331
Joined: 4/8/2007
From: Dallas, TX
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: saraimay75

How do I get myself on the the national news???


Run for President.
Post #: 213
RE: July Game Thread - BAD ADVICE - 7/17/2008 2:06:45 AM   
Prairiehiker


Posts: 2568
Joined: 12/11/2007
From: The little house in the prairie
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: saraimay75

How do I get myself on the the national news???


Go to one of the Patriot's game and run around nekkid screaming "TOM BRADY, I WANT TO HAVE YOUR BAYYYYYBEEEEE!". That should do it. You'll even make the national news in Canada, trust me on this one, lol.

_____________________________

O Lord my God, When I in awesome wonder,
Consider all the worlds Thy Hands have made;

Then sings my soul, my Saviour God to Thee
How great Thou art, How great Thou art.

Climbing the Bald Hill with my daughter
Post #: 214
RE: July Game Thread - BAD ADVICE - 7/17/2008 5:17:50 AM   
mutinywxgirl


Posts: 12859
Joined: 4/29/2005
From: west coast of FL
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Prairiehiker

quote:

ORIGINAL: saraimay75

How do I get myself on the the national news???


Go to one of the Patriot's game and run around nekkid screaming "TOM BRADY, I WANT TO HAVE YOUR BAYYYYYBEEEEE!". That should do it. You'll even make the national news in Canada, trust me on this one, lol.



LOLOLOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

_____________________________

When blood and water hit the ground.
Walls we couldn't move came crashing down.
We were free and made alive.
The day true love died. The day true love died.


Lisa is happy THE ROWDIES ARE BACK!
Post #: 215
RE: July Game Thread - BAD ADVICE - 7/17/2008 10:29:33 PM   
teaspoon61


Posts: 631
Joined: 5/11/2005
From: S.C.
Status: offline
I just paid off my van. WOO HOO!
Now that I don't have a car payment, what should I do with the extra $$$ I will have each month??

_____________________________

<--- Lucky

Bloom where you are planted!

We cannot control the outcome of our prayers, but in faith we can expect great things.
Post #: 216
RE: July Game Thread - BAD ADVICE - 7/17/2008 10:35:11 PM   
trinigirl722


Posts: 331
Joined: 4/8/2007
From: Dallas, TX
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: teaspoon61

I just paid off my van. WOO HOO!
Now that I don't have a car payment, what should I do with the extra $$$ I will have each month??


Go find a good casino to spend it in. You're bound to make even more money that way!
Post #: 217
RE: July Game Thread - BAD ADVICE - 7/18/2008 1:55:16 PM   
saraimay75


Posts: 7884
Joined: 5/11/2005
From: Wherever God plants me.
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: teaspoon61

I just paid off my van. WOO HOO!
Now that I don't have a car payment, what should I do with the extra $$$ I will have each month??


Buy another car.

_____________________________

God love admiration . . . I think it annoys God if you walk by the color purple in a field somewhere and don't notice it.
~Alice Walker~

http://360.yahoo.com/saraimay75
Post #: 218
RE: July Game Thread - BAD ADVICE - 7/19/2008 12:09:09 PM   
humbleinspirit


Posts: 18135
Joined: 4/13/2005
From: Just Outside of Boston
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: teaspoon61

I just paid off my van. WOO HOO!
Now that I don't have a car payment, what should I do with the extra $$$ I will have each month??


You should take all of the money that you save and go to Vegas and play all of the money on one single bet at the casino.

_____________________________

Post #: 219
RE: July Game Thread - BAD ADVICE - 7/19/2008 12:13:20 PM   
Prairiehiker


Posts: 2568
Joined: 12/11/2007
From: The little house in the prairie
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: teaspoon61

I just paid off my van. WOO HOO!
Now that I don't have a car payment, what should I do with the extra $$$ I will have each month??


Do you want me to PM you my address? I'll gladly take your money problems (or lack thereof) away for you.

_____________________________

O Lord my God, When I in awesome wonder,
Consider all the worlds Thy Hands have made;

Then sings my soul, my Saviour God to Thee
How great Thou art, How great Thou art.

Climbing the Bald Hill with my daughter
Post #: 220
RE: July Game Thread - BAD ADVICE - 7/19/2008 12:35:31 PM   
shemaromans

 

Posts: 3876
Joined: 3/30/2007
Status: offline
I'll be attending a wedding soon and am determined to catch the bouquet during the toss. What can I do to ensure that I catch it?

_____________________________

"But as for me, it is good to be near God." Psalm 73:28
Post #: 221
RE: July Game Thread - BAD ADVICE - 7/19/2008 12:39:19 PM   
Prairiehiker


Posts: 2568
Joined: 12/11/2007
From: The little house in the prairie
Status: offline
Wow, that's a tough one. Hmmmm.....the only thing I can think of is to strap a bomb on you and when the bouquet throwing starts, starts screaming, "OK PEOPLE, I GET THIS BOUQUET OR WE ALL DIE"!

< Message edited by Prairiehiker -- 7/19/2008 12:47:39 PM >


_____________________________

O Lord my God, When I in awesome wonder,
Consider all the worlds Thy Hands have made;

Then sings my soul, my Saviour God to Thee
How great Thou art, How great Thou art.

Climbing the Bald Hill with my daughter
Post #: 222
RE: July Game Thread - BAD ADVICE - 7/19/2008 12:42:56 PM   
mutinywxgirl


Posts: 12859
Joined: 4/29/2005
From: west coast of FL
Status: offline
LOLOLOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

_____________________________

When blood and water hit the ground.
Walls we couldn't move came crashing down.
We were free and made alive.
The day true love died. The day true love died.


Lisa is happy THE ROWDIES ARE BACK!
Post #: 223
RE: July Game Thread - BAD ADVICE - 7/19/2008 12:44:00 PM   
humbleinspirit


Posts: 18135
Joined: 4/13/2005
From: Just Outside of Boston
Status: offline
Make sure that you are wearing high heels after you have just clean them with polish and then grab a skateboard to ensure a speedy catch!

_____________________________

Post #: 224
RE: July Game Thread - BAD ADVICE - 7/19/2008 1:15:56 PM   
Grace-N-Mercy


Posts: 6512
Joined: 5/2/2005
Status: offline
Just as the bouquet is being tossed, yell "Oh my gosh, it's *insert swoon-worthy name here*" When all the heads turn, the bouquet is yours!
Post #: 225
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