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Harvie -> RE: Want to Lose? (11/12/2007 4:28:30 PM)
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HAVE YOU LOST WEIGHT? Hey! Have you lost weight? What is it about this seemingly innocuous (and complimentary) question makes me want to rant some days? I think it is the absolutely inappropriate use of the word "LOSE" in the context of weight reduction and dieting. After all, the dictionary definition of "LOSE" is as follows: to come to be without (something in one's possession or care), through accident, theft, etc., so that there is little or no prospect of recovery; to fail inadvertently to retain (something) in such a way that it cannot be immediately recovered. Let's face it, peeps. We don't "LOSE" weight in the sense that we absentmindedly leave a pound or two here and there as if they were wayward car keys or the long lost remote control. And nobody is stealing any of MY fat. In fact, no one I know accidentally or inadvertently "LOSES" weight these days. Nope, nope, nope ... not at all. If anything, we have to pry weight from our bodies like those annoying price stickers stuck onto items that we are trying to wrap as holiday presents. You know the kind that you lose fingernails scraping off, using everything from a crowbar to boiling water to lighter fluid? THAT, my friends, is sort of like what it's like prying those extra pounds clinging to our chubby bodies. And THEN comes the really hard part .... keeping that weight off ... which is much like trying to shove gummi worms through a keyhole in a doorknob. Of course, in polite society, it is usually best to just smile and be gracious and say "Yes, I have lost weight" rather than embarking on a 10 minute rant involving price stickers and gummi worms, lest people conclude that my calorie deficit has caused some sort of escape from sanity....even though that's probably true! And I will just politely continue the myth and misconception that either (a) hordes of marauding criminals are breaking into my home at night and filching my fat; or (b) I have become a lovable absent-minded housewife who keeps blithely misplacing spare pounds as I wander the grocery store aisles. "Clean up on Aisle Six. Someone left a whole bunch of pounds in the Produce Department." =^..^= HARVIE
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