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What turns you off in a partner or mate - 8/13/2008 8:31:16 AM
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revbob4God
Posts: 602
Joined: 7/25/2008
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Ladies,
Greetings and salutations. Hope everyone is having a wonderful day. Next question, what really turns you off in a mate or partner, and why.
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For thus saith the Lord that created the heavens; God himself that formed the earth and made it; he hath established it, he created it not in vain, he formed it to be inhabited: I the Lord; and none else.
Isaiah 45:18
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RE: What turns you off in a partner or mate - 8/13/2008 9:35:29 AM
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mrsrevbob
Posts: 185
Joined: 7/31/2008
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It really turns me off when somebody acts like they know everything there is to know about me, but don't because it is almost like saying "Spare me the mystery, I am no longer interested."
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RE: What turns you off in a partner or mate - 8/13/2008 4:42:45 PM
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3tulips
Posts: 320
Joined: 2/1/2007
From: sandy shore
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Right now what is really turning me off in my partner (husband) is his inability to say no to his mom. I am not respected in my own home. She can come anytime she wants to and my husband does not either say "No" or "let me discuss this with 3tulips first."
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I opened up the mouth of love and found the wisdom tooth. Larry Norman 1947 - 2008
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RE: What turns you off in a partner or mate - 8/13/2008 7:46:36 PM
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twinkly
Posts: 146
Joined: 6/21/2008
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well, from past partners I can tell you what turned me off:
selfishness: everything revolved around their happiness. If I needed to talk or to cry or just someone to listen, I did not get it. But if THEY needed that, I had better drop everything and do it or else *I* didn't care.
Having my needs put to the back burner or not met at all.
Disrespect of boundaries.
not working as a team. My exhusband and I actually had separate bank accounts and I had no idea how much money he made or had!
I am completely turned off when my partner will not help around the house and with the kids. If we both work full time then we both need to help.
I probably should stop here cuz I could say more!
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God FIRST, family second, and all else will fall into place.
My side business:
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Let me help you make some fun mad money!
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RE: What turns you off in a partner or mate - 8/13/2008 7:50:59 PM
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sudden
Posts: 166
Joined: 4/12/2005
From: Toronto
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Stinky morning breath!
Sudden
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I will lie down in rest and sleep and peace, for thou, O Lord, only makest me to dwell in safety.
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RE: What turns you off in a partner or mate - 8/14/2008 12:36:11 AM
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Focusing
Posts: 6043
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Someone who doesn't take the time to listen when I'm trying to share something important, you know the mindless "um hum" while his eyes are still glued to the television.
Someone who cannot respect boundaries. Not just boundaries that I set, but boundaries that others set as well.
Immaturity. It's one thing to play around and have fun, I am all for that, but when I have reached my limit and say enough and he keeps poking at me like an annoying little brother - bye.
Insensitivity. Okay, the dress may not be the most flattering thing he's ever seen on me, but it isn't necessary to say "Ah! You look really horrible in that!" Or, after a really difficult day, I want an ear to listen and let me just get it off my chest. I do not want to hear "You're just being a whiny crybaby" or "Suck it up" or even worse "Oh, it's that time of the month huh."
And as Twinkly said: working as a team. If we are both working full time jobs, we both need to contribute to running the house.
_____________________________
There is an appointed time for everything. And there is a time for every event under heaven
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RE: What turns you off in a partner or mate - 8/15/2008 8:30:30 AM
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car2ner
Posts: 2936
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: just north of Florida
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Lying!
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"May your days be long and your hardships few".
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RE: What turns you off in a partner or mate - 8/15/2008 11:38:58 AM
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ames01
Posts: 132
Joined: 5/11/2007
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Ditto this:
quote:
selfishness: everything revolved around their happiness. If I needed to talk or to cry or just someone to listen, I did not get it. But if THEY needed that, I had better drop everything and do it or else *I* didn't care.
Having my needs put to the back burner or not met at all.
and this:
quote:
Lying!
I would include lying by omission in that as well.
A few I haven't seen mentioned:
- Finding the time to do everything else he wants to do, but being "too busy" to spend any time with me.
- Being unwilling to talk about problems and find a mutually acceptable solution.
- Saying nasty and hurtful things in anger.
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RE: What turns you off in a partner or mate - 8/15/2008 1:03:54 PM
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Angie_K
Posts: 50
Joined: 2/6/2007
From: ~MISSOURI ~
Status: offline
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Being interrupted.
Not listening or paying attention.
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MERCY TRIUMPHS OVER JUDGMENT
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RE: What turns you off in a partner or mate - 8/15/2008 8:21:37 PM
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Prairiehiker
Posts: 2586
Joined: 12/11/2007
From: The little house in the prairie
Status: offline
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Ignorance
self centredness
Shallowness/pretentiousness
Overly Materialistic/greed
Extremely status conscious
lack of interest in anything other than his job or money
Too serious
No sense of adventure
Bad hygiene (#1)
No sense of kindness and compassion
bad mouths his exes
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O Lord my God, When I in awesome wonder,
Consider all the worlds Thy Hands have made;
I see the stars, I hear the rolling thunder
Thy power through out the universe displayed
How great Thou art, How great Thou art.
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RE: What turns you off in a partner or mate - 8/21/2008 9:59:24 PM
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Catalpa
Posts: 73
Joined: 4/12/2005
From: The Late, Great, State of Michigan
Status: offline
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Lying.
Arrogance.
Bad hygiene.
Irresponsibility.
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I use billions of dollars of military technology to find tupperware in the woods. What do you do for a hobby?
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RE: What turns you off in a partner or mate - 8/21/2008 10:28:06 PM
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rgod
Posts: 1539
Joined: 4/25/2005
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A pet peeve of mine is a guy who wants to continually stereotyping women and men. Like, if someone says "men are like this ______ but women are like this ______" - and it keeps happening over and over again - I don't like it because I don't think that there are one-size-fits-all statements that you can make about everybody. Every woman isn't sensitive, emotional, and wanting to marry at all costs. All men are not commitment phobic, logical, and out of tune with his emotions. It makes me feel like he doesn't really see me when he's putting me in some kind of a box or a category and it also makes me wonder if he knows himself well. Occasional statements as we talk about the differences between the sexes is one thing - but blanket - iron-clad statements are just plain annoying to me.
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RE: What turns you off in a partner or mate - 8/22/2008 7:06:31 PM
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ChiefWannahakaloogie
Posts: 4810
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: under your bed
Status: offline
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skinny guys. dishonest guys. disrespectful guys. guys who arent fun and crazy, or who are afraid to be fun and crazy.
and uhm idk a few others i suppose.
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Ich bin eine wütende bäcker frau, und iche backe dich
*food*
Ice cream love
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RE: What turns you off in a partner or mate - 8/22/2008 8:41:45 PM
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rgod
Posts: 1539
Joined: 4/25/2005
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I forgot - my number one pet peeve -- WANDERING EYES!!!! (Yuck!!!!)
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RE: What turns you off in a partner or mate - 8/27/2008 11:31:16 AM
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Ps103
Posts: 11695
Joined: 4/16/2005
From: Here, now
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This is really too similar to THIS and other threads here.
Please continue in the linked thread.
Thanks!
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Fasten your seatbelts...it's going to be a bumpy night.
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